Adventures of Ardis

The 5 Stages.

2012-02-10T00:19:00.001-07:00

Today, I was reading and came a paragraph about the "five stages of grief". While I am familiar with these stages, as I think most of us are, since my dad has passed away, I haven't thought about them whatsoever. And so, coming across the five stages:

1. Denial
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

I have a difficult time finding myself and my own experiences in them. A term that we've heard a lot, first in the hospital and now in discussion of mourning, is "process". It's part of the process, we're in a process, you have to understand the process. Frankly, I do not want to be in a process and I kind of hate this process.

In terms of this process or the stages of grief, I feel as though instead of experiencing a type of linear progression through the different levels, I am jumping back and forth between the stages rather quickly and experience each element every day. I still want to deny what has happened has happened. I look into my dad's study to think that by some chance, he'll be there. Waves of realization hit me where I cannot even believe that he has passed away. I get so angry that he isn't going to be here when Sarah and I are married and have children or when I think about how wrongly I felt he was treated in the hospital, even though I also realize how richly blessed we were to have my miracle father around for such a substantial part of our lives, when he was told he would not live countless times and yet was physically here for 25 amazing years of my life. But then, even though I wouldn't want him to have to come back and experience pain again, as he is now pain-free, I bargain that if by some miracle, I could have him back for just a little bit longer to talk to him once more because time passed by so quickly and it's already been a month since I've last spoken with him and I need him in my life. I experience the depression - not in a way that you have to worry about me, but in that I lived my life to make my dad proud and I feel as though I cannot imagine a life without my father physically present as a constant companion and support. The acceptance is not in any large means, but instead is composed of small moments when I feel that we are going to make it through and that life will become meaningful again. Those moments are triumphs. But then I bounce back and forth between the stages - from denial to depression, from bargaining to anger to acceptance and back again.

The acceptance is particularly difficult for me to comprehend. The idea that eventually grief can turn to acceptance seems completely impossible and painful to even fathom. But the above-linked article by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler gives me a bit more comfort in the idea that it's not acceptance in the manner of life returning to normal:

"Acceptance is often confused with the notion of being “all right” or “OK” with what has happened. This is not the case. Most people don’t ever feel OK or all right about the loss of a loved one. This stage is about accepting the reality that our loved one is physically gone and recognizing that this new reality is the permanent reality. We will never like this reality or make it OK, but eventually we accept it. We learn to live with it. It is the new norm with which we must learn to live. We must try to live now in a world where our loved one is missing. In resisting this new norm, at first many people want to maintain life as it was before a loved one died. In time, through bits and pieces of acceptance, however, we see that we cannot maintain the past intact. It has been forever changed and we must readjust."

~~~~~~~~~~~

Tonight, even as I was thinking about my own grief process (there's that dreadful word again) and the five stages, I suddenly remembered something that brought a smile to my face in the midst of troubled thoughts. My dad always found some way to bring something light or humorous into difficult situations in a manner that always made it possible to cope more effectively, and maybe he was sending me a little reminder of doing that just as my heart was heavy, because I suddenly had pop into my mind one of my favorite scenes from Monk. It's when Adrian Monk is quickly cycling through the stages of grief, in a type of microcosm of the grieving experience, over his psychiatrist's decision to quit his practice. I showed it to my dad about a month and a half ago and we laughed about it together. It somehow makes my thoughts about grief tonight all a bit better, to know that they are somehow tied to a light moment that my dad and I shared recently.

The 5 Stages of Grief from John Duncan on Vimeo.

Peering into the world with all joyous expectation.

2012-01-26T01:00:00.000-07:00

This photo perfectly describes what I feel like I learned from my dad -

inquisitive wonder, joy, and enjoyment of all that life has to offer.

Or, in my father's own words, discussing the death of his dear brother Craig eighteen years ago:

"Those of us left behind should also wait for our time, and not actively seek the world where Craig is now. Craig's greatest wish, as well as others who have passed beyond, is for us to seek out and experience the joy that can be contained in literally every moment of life, if we will but open our eyes and see it."

Dad, thank you for teaching me, in your own words, how to approach both death and life. What I will try to remember in the coming days is what my dad taught me about cherishing life and finding joy.

Because that is what my dad did, and that is the purpose of life.

Overwhelming love - the good kind of overwhelming.

2012-01-23T17:12:00.001-07:00

Since my father has passed away, there have been moments when I am going about my day and I suddenly experience a deep, overwhelming knowledge that my father loves me. The latest time this happened was just a few minutes ago, as I was hanging photographs. There is never any particular event that the feeling is attached to or prompted by, it seems - instead, it feels as though it encompasses all. These feelings, when they occur, speak peace to my heart and bring a poignant smile to my face. I know it is my father reminding me, as he did so often, that he loves me and is proud of me.

I am grateful that I never for a second doubted that my father had immense love for me and my sister. I find peace in the fact that in every moment of my life, I have known that my father was proud of me. And I am so thankful that my father is still telling me of his pride and his love in sweet, still times of peace and assurance.

Love, love, love, love, love.

2012-01-20T21:29:00.002-07:00

Some things are too meaningful/painful to put into words, such as the last several weeks. Let me just say that I love my father more than I can ever possibly express or describe, and I am so proud of him for graduating with honors to the next life. My dad loved when I talked about him on my blog and that will come, but let me let one of our dear family friends speak for me a bit.

Updates. (Figurative and Literal).

2012-01-05T01:51:00.000-07:00

~ We hopefully will find out what is making my father so ill in the next day or two, so we can then get him treatment and help him feel better. A hard thing about the situation for the past two weeks is that when he's been released from the hospital, it's not because he's better, like many would assume, but because they couldn't do anything for him - first, because everyone was gone over Christmas weekend and second, because they were waiting for test results. It's hard to see him so sick. Have I mentioned how much I love this guy?

~ I finished the first drafts of my two NMUN background guide updates. During this process, I remembered (as I always do) how fascinated I am about the world around us and also about the UN. And I'm feeling pretty grand about completing my drafts!

~ I discovered that this song happened to #1 during the week of my birth:

Who knew. Maybe I'll have to dislike it slightly less.

31 December

2011-12-31T21:49:00.002-07:00

I cannot believe that it's the end of 2011. This year seemed to pass excessively quickly. It was a wonderful year, and though it ends on feelings of uncertainty and worry, I am hopeful for the next year and look forward to the blessings it will bring!

Speaking about blessings, my blessing for today is the accomplishment of long-held goals. For me, this is the writing of at least one blessing each day for the entire year. I have been looking over some of my blog posts in retrospective, and was amazed to find that there were many days where I listed several blessings that I had found in my day. What I have learned over the course of the past year, in counting my blessings and approaching life through positivity, is that there are so many blessings in our lives. Some we realize; many we do not. However, they all enrich our lives and when we pause to think about them, we can focus more on how our lives are blessed and beautiful despite difficulties. In fact, the difficulties often help us understand our blessings better, if we allow ourselves the proper way of viewing our circumstances. As a wonderful quote says,

"Every day may not be good. But there is something good in every day."

That is one of the conclusions that I came across this past year, as I daily focused on my blessings. And what I also found is that, in retrospect, there are many more of the "good" days in life than we may initially realize.

I also realized, as I have discussed before, how much God loves us and how much He promises us. We are His children. Just as our parents do, He loves us conditionally and wants the best for us. And, He wants us to be happy in life and find joy. That is our purpose during our lives and what we must constantly seek - not fleeting happiness or pleasure, but real, deep happiness and fulfillment.

I had many amazing experiences this year. A few highlights of some of the most wonderful/important days are as follows (in chronological order, not order of importance):

~ Meeting Prince Charles

~ Celebrating Holi (and pretty much everything I did ever with my Cambridge friends)

~ Visiting the Netherlands and Belgium

~ Attending the temple for the first time

~ National Model United Nations conference in NYC

~ The Royal Wedding

~ Finishing my dissertation

~ Exploring Poland

~ The once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to travel through Europe with my family

~ Ca mbridge graduation

Other amazing things that enriched my life included making and building relationships with life-long friends, having the opportunity to visit many domestic and international temples, and spending time with my family.

As the new year approaches, I plan on continuing my blog - writing about my many new adventures in life that will invariably come in the following year, as well as many of the blessings that fill my life. However, just to let you know, one of my big goals for the following year is to write more in my personal journal as another source of recording my life {and a way of recording my deep dark secrets that you haven't seen on the pages of my blog - I'm not about to talk about who I'm crushing on here, after all! :)} This means that I will probably not blog every day, but more likely once or twice a week. But I promise - there will be great experiences and positivity shared in 2012, and I would love for you to continue to share in those with me!

Happy New Year, merry 2012, and as we begin the new year, keep in mind one of my favorite sayings:

And remember to keep on shuffling:

Life is Beautiful:

One more important thing that we can remember in the New Year:

"And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost.

And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things."

~ Moroni 10: 4-5

27-30 December

2011-12-31T10:40:00.000-07:00

A few fantastic things and a few stressful things happened in this amount of time. Let me share the stressful first: Dad is still ill and the doctors don't know why. (And meanwhile, due to complete non-communication on the part of the doctors, an important test that was supposed to happen last week can't happen until next.) But he is home again for New Year's and then my goal for the first part of 2012: figure out what's wrong and help him get better!

Of course in life, the difficult often makes you appreciate the better even more. This week was one that I have been looking forward to for quite some time - several of my friends from BYU and Cambridge returned to the great land of Utah and we were able to get together! Most of my beloved friends are no longer in the area, and so it felt like a feast of friendship. Tuesday brought sushi with Alex (in which we ate much more sushi than I ever thought possible) and then the dynamic visiting combo of Dan and Alex; Wednesday was the amazing experience to dine with Courtney, Dan, Peter, Tim, Alex, Lyndon, Courtney, Ruth, Jeff, and Sam at Old Spaghetti Factory; and Thursday featured a delightful brunch with Amy, Dave, Lyndon, Christine, and Dan. I am kicking myself for not taking more pictures; the only photos I have of these moments are as follows:

too much sushi should not ever be possible, but after approx. 10 rolls and 20 orders of nigiri, it became so

brunch at Denny's with some grand people:

Sometimes I wish it was possible to export photographic memories into actual images, because I'll hold on to the memories of those moments as long as I can.

Speaking of memories to remember forever, Friday brought the sealing of my cousin Jessica to her husband and daughter in the Salt Lake City Temple. It was a great blessing to be in the temple for a few hours with our family to worship and to celebrate Jessica and Tavish on such an important day. I am amazed with the blessings that God has prepared for His children. We are truly blessed beyond what we can imagine and should treasure all that we have.

So, there were many blessing for these days, but I'll highlight:

~ the sealing power, referred to in the Bible and now restored on earth to bind families together for eternity
~ the promises and blessings that God bestows upon His children
~ reunions with dear friends
~ OSF (ask Sarah about that one)

Life is Beautiful:

I inscribed this quote:

“The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.” – St. Augustine

On the Courtney's Christmas present (with the places that we explored together this year):

Because that quote encapsulates my friend Courtney perfectly! It also embodies why we should travel - in order to understand the world and its people far better, thus allowing us to understand ourselves better as well.

23-26 December

2011-12-25T14:36:00.000-07:00

Happy Holidays!

I hope that the weekend has brought joy to you and your family as you celebrate time spent with one another and the birth of Christ! We have had a cherished day at home together and not in the hospital as originally anticipated - they released my dad to come home for the holiday weekend, so we've been able to spend time together here. We had a delightful Christmas morning full of presents and self-tanner (it's a long story) and then Sarah and I went to the Christmas service in our ward, which was a sweet reminder of the day's purpose. All of the presents we gave and received were wonderful and thoughtful and kind of awesome, really.

{new matching slipper boots with our already matching pyjamas}

My blessings:

~ The birth of Jesus Christ, who is the Living Christ.

~ The chance to make meaningful gifts. As almost all gifts have been delivered (except a few that I will post at a later date because they're pretty snazzy but have not been passed on to their recipients yet), let me share a few of the things that Santa delivered today:

For mom: personalized stationary kit

For dad: Scrabble-themed presents, including word square and double word square tile coasters, and handpainted Little Prince plates

~ Spontaneous rendezvous moments. I ran into one of my closest friends from London yesterday at Color Me Mine, and it was pretty great!

~ Thoughtful neighbors who take seriously the charge to "love thy neighbor as thyself". With all the madness going on in the last week, our neighbors brought us two delicious meals, including a decadent and delicious meal on Christmas Eve!

I hope you all had a very happy Christmas and holidays!

p.s. Yes, for New Year's, Little Mermaid fireworks are now available at your local Macey's:

Life is Beautiful:

"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." ~ John 3:16

22 December

2011-12-23T01:22:00.003-07:00

My poor, wonderful father is in the hospital with some troubling health concerns, and it looks like we may be spending Christmas at the hospital. Although it is not the #1 location that we'd choose for the holidays, we will make it a good Christmas, and we will be there together and in a place where there are kind and thoughtful people!

Today, my blessing was the carolers that came and sang in the hospital corridor this afternoon. I was feeling a bit sad and overwhelmed, when we suddenly heard a distant group singing "Away in the Manger." As the voices neared his room, I was overtaken with the lyrics and the reminder of God's love and of our Savior, whom we are celebrating this season. It was also a reminder to have faith and that all things will be okay.

They're still trying to figure out what exactly is going on with my dad, so please keep him in your prayers/send positive thoughts into the universe for him! Thank you in advance!

Life is Beautiful:

Perhaps one of the best passages of Isaiah:

For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
~ Isaiah 9:6

21 December

2011-12-22T01:22:00.000-07:00

Today was one of those ca-razy days. Very much so. I won't go into too much detail to explain, but the following story illustrates it:

Most of the day was spent at a medical clinic, and when we had to leave and go somewhere important, the weather that had been like this all day:

(beautiful, crisp, clear}

turned into a horrific BLIZZARD. Like, at the exact moment that we had to leave. Talk about crazy weather! Luckily, it only lasted for a few minutes and then things got much better again. But, that story is an analogy for the day.

Today I'm grateful for competent, caring doctors. I feel that they can be few and far between, and they make all the difference in the world.

Life is Beautiful:

Did I share this already? I LOVE it.

Source: borntomakeanimpact.tumblr.com via Ardis on Pinterest

8-20 December

2011-12-20T23:51:00.003-07:00

Once upon a time, I had a blog.

Sorry for the long absence! I am back, along with just a few blessings:

~ little kid dance recitals, like the one that my adorable and sweet cousin was in last week.

~ homemade Christmas presents. This year will largely be a homemade Christmas, but what I love is that although the presents I've been working on are homemade, they're pretty darn snazzy (if I do say so myself) and very personalized.

~ the Christmas spirit. Can it be the Christmas season for the next two months, please?

~ hot pink sweaters.

~ outdoor Christmas lights. Some kind people in our ward came over and helped us get our outdoor lights up, and it makes me feel happy every time I see them.

~ Hobby Lobby. I never thought a craft store could have my heart more than Michaels, but I have a new love and it is Hobby Lobby.

~ plans with friends you haven't seen for too long. In the coming week, I get to see many of my friends from England and elsewhere, and I am so. freaking. excited.

~ adorable little kids that come and talk to you. I was at Color Me Mine last week and this cute girl came up to me and started asking me what I was painting and why I was using masking tape and told me about what she had painted. It was way adorable.

~ paramedics. We had need of them today (don't worry, everything is now fine), and it is a significant blessing that within a few minutes you can have people to help in a time of need.

~ friends that are your sister's friends that are your friends too. I am grateful for the amazing and kind friends that my sister has and how good they are to her, and I love the chance that I have to be friends with them too.

~ Revelation, which is one of my favorite scriptural books. We've been studying it in Sunday School and I enjoy discussing the analogies and promises located in that book.

~ Christmas cards!

~ funny SNL videos, like the Tim Tebow sketch recently. ("Mormonism - all true.")

Life is Beautiful:

A favorite scriptural passage is Revelation 7:9-17, which features such wonderful promises (particularly the last verse):

" After this I beheld, and, lo, a great multitude, which no man could number, of all nations, and kindreds, and people, and tongues, stood before the throne, and before the Lamb, clothed with white robes, and palms in their hands;

And cried with a loud voice, saying, Salvation to our God which sitteth upon the throne, and unto the Lamb.

And all the angels stood round about the throne, and about the elders and the four beasts, and fell before the throne on their faces, and worshipped God,

Saying, Amen: Blessing, and glory, and wisdom, and thanksgiving, and honour, and power, and might, be unto our God for ever and ever. Amen.

And one of the elders answered, saying unto me, What are these which are arrayed in white robes? and whence came they?

And I said unto him, Sir, thou knowest. And he said to me, These are they which came out of great tribulation, and have washed their robes, and made them white in the blood of the Lamb.

Therefore are they before the throne of God, and serve him day and night in his temple: and he thatsitteth on the throne shall dwell among them.

They shall hunger no more, neither thirst any more; neither shall the sun light on them, nor any heat.

For the Lamb which is in the midst of the throne shall feed them, and shall lead them unto living fountains of waters: and God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes."

6-7 December

2011-12-08T01:33:00.001-07:00

Now advertising:

Two gingerbread homes that are prime real estate. One features Misfit Elephant (apparently I need to brush on my Christmas specials because I don't remember him) in the front yard, a beautiful snow-waved roof with pearl gathers, and one abominable snowman and one Santa that happened to be a part of an experiment involving the effects of blowtorches on gummy characters:

The other includes a candy-lined cobblestone front path, a pearl wreath above the door, and bushes for Rudolph and his friends to graze upon next to a candy mosaic path:

Yeah, decorating gingerbread houses is definitely one of my favorite holiday traditions. My sister and I try to do it each year, and this year, my father bought us the deluxe type of gingerbread house kits - you know, the kind where the gingerbread actually smells good and there's a large amount of candy provided and, best of all, you have gummy characters (and they taste good too, which I know because the abominable snowman was just too weird to put on my house).

Today was one of those days where I decided to stay in sweats and read the fourth Twilight book again. I discovered that if I skip all the parts that I despise, I actually kind of enjoyed reading it. I think this is only my second time reading through it - I disliked it so much the first time I didn't feel like picking it up again, but after seeing the movie, I wanted to compare and contrast the movie and the book. Anywho, I love days when you dedicate your day to a single book and engulf yourself in it until you're finished. It's probably one of my favorite ways to read. Although, I did feel a bit sheepish when a member of our ward, a former university president, came over and as we visited asked what I was reading. After admitting what I was reading, I was relieved to discover that he wasn't familiar with Twilight. We then proceeded to discuss Roman poets. Note to self: read an intellectually stimulating book next.

Life is Beautiful:

Quote I discovered today:

“Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy.” ~ Guillaume Apollinaire

Amen. It's hard sometimes not to let the journey obstruct the experiences of life.

5 December

2011-12-06T02:02:00.001-07:00

Today, I am grateful for many things, including this -

I love learning neat little tricks that make life just the slightest bit easier. Like, learning that you can easily use a straw to core a strawberry and remove the leafy top. Which, until today, has been the bane of my strawberry-chopping existence. Thank you once again, pinterest.

Life is Beautiful:

A quote I discovered through my friend Josie, about making a difference in our sphere of influence:

"We must remember those mortals in parking lots, offices, elevators and elsewhere are that portion of mankind God has given us to love and to serve...Just think of the number of people on this earth you will never meet. Doesn’t it seem likely that those we do meet are more than mere coincidences or inconveniences? They are the people that God would have us learn to love and serve."

~ Suzette Gee, BYU-I devotional, 29 November 2011

2-4 December

2011-12-05T00:08:00.001-07:00

Here are a few of my favorite things:

~ Sacred moments with family members. The Bible Dictionary entry on "Temple" states:

"Only the home can compare with the temple in sacredness."

I believe that completely, and some of the most sacred moments I have had have occurred when I was in my home or in the homes of loved ones with family. I experienced one of those sacred moments in the home of some of our dear family members on Friday, as we gathered together to enjoy one another's company and celebrate the Christmas season. In those moments I feel the depths of eternal love and the knowledge that there is something more than this life alone.

~ Nativities. My mother loves nativities, and as a family we often seek out new or unique nativities during the Christmas season. This nativity at the Provo Temple is one of my favorites that I've seen, because of the expressions of Mary and Joseph:

~ The positive motivation that comes from the idea of "being doers of the word, and not hearers", as we discussed at church. I want to do more, be more, and serve more, and outwardly express and practice those things that I believe in life.

Life is Beautiful:

The First Presidency of the LDS Church held a Christmas devotional this evening, and it was reminded us of the true reason that we celebrate Christmas: the birth of our Savior.

(I loved the version of the MoTab's "Joy to the World": it starts around the 59 minute mark of this video.)

30 November - 1 December

2011-12-01T21:37:00.001-07:00

Today I'm feeling a little like "Meadowlark" + "Skinny Love" + "The Scientist" + every acoustic song by Jason Mraz + my whole Iron & Wine playlist. It's been a slightly off day, but I'm actually thankful for days like today, because they make you realize how glad you are that it's not one of those days where everything goes HORRIBLY wrong. Instead, everything was just slightly off, but only in a partially inconvenient manner. The worst part of the day was this:

Okay, it was a pretty sad moment when I picked up my phone and saw that. But I've had my phone for three years and I feel like it's done me well. I'll have to make it do for a while until I can get a new one (the screen still works!), but at least it lasted as long as it did. The rest of the day was filled with minor things like not being able to find a debit card at the checkstand and then losing the keys in the car (yeah, it's weird), but they weren't really that bad, and it made me appreciate that things could be a lot worse and they weren't. And it really, overall, was a pretty good day.

I am also grateful for discovering new great things. Like, this fondant recipe that we used to decorate some amazingly yummy cookies yesterday. I love baking shows and for years I've seen bakers use fondant but have never used it myself until yesterday. However, that recipe from pinterest turned out great! The best part, even better then how inexpensive it is, is that it actually tastes good, compared to how horrible fondant normally tastes. And it makes pretty cute cookies.

Yum.

Life is Beautiful:

Eiffel Tower nocturne.

29 November

2011-11-30T02:09:00.001-07:00

So close to December and less than a month away from Christmas...I am excited. Today, we decided to surprise our parents and set up the Christmas tree while they were away. Their reactions when they returned made it so worth it, and now it feels even more like Christmas around here!

My blessing for the day is spontaneous bonding moments. My dad and I just had a delightful time preparing cookie dough together for this delicious-looking recipe. It made me happy and those simple moments are always exquisite.

Life is Beautiful:

Have I shared this yet? Sorry if I have, but the first part of this is my life motto and what I'm working on right now:

Source: cocktailsandcashmere.blogspot.com via Ardis on Pinterest

28 November

2011-11-29T00:35:00.001-07:00

At times lately, I feel like there's not much going on in my life, and that that must mean that this will last and will be my new reality.
And, just like what happened to me today, I have an overwhelming yet simple feeling of comfort wash over me with the reminder that this is a temporary time, where I am weighing many good options, and life will be what I want it to be again.
It is feelings of comfort like this that are my blessings for the day and on many days.

Life is Beautiful:

I love 1 Kings 9:11-12:

"And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake:

And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice."

26-27 November

2011-11-28T01:04:00.001-07:00

Today I am thankful for:

~ Individual worth. As we were discussing Dieter F. Uchtdorf's great talk "You Matter to Him", a sister in the ward referenced this 2002 quote from Neal A. Maxwell:

"Brothers and sisters, our individual worth is already divinely established as “great”; it does not fluctuate like the stock market."

What a great reminder of our individual worth! How true is that - even though our feelings of personal worth can go up and down frequently, we have to remember that our eternal worth never changes. It's always much larger than we can even imagine.

~ Josh Groban. In college, I have fond memories of listening to Josh as we all stood in front of the mirrors and got ready for church every Sunday. He is such an epically great performer. And kind of hilarious, a la his frequent popular culture appearances (remember him as a judge on Glee? So funny).

Here are my two faves:

I am melting right now.

Life is Beautiful:

Big Ben nocturne -

25 November

2011-11-26T02:25:00.001-07:00

The Christmas season is a huge blessing in my life, and one of the happiest segments of each year for me. The period of time after Thanksgiving leading up to Christmas has always been absolutely magical to me. Lights and trees glisten, people are kinder and find ways to serve one another, and there is more of a feeling of brotherly (and sisterly) love on the earth, at least to me. It is a time to appreciate who we have in our lives.

Today marked what I consider to officially be the beginning of the Christmas season - Snurffle Day. Snurffle Day, our family holiday, is the day after Christmas. {Although it has nothing to do with the actual etymology of the word, which is from my father, I just discovered that on urban dictionary, "snurffle" means "to smother with love". Appropriate.} Growing up, Snurffle Day meant going out to the Christmas tree farm, exploring for just the perfect tree, then drinking free hot cocoa and potentially even a visit with Santa as the tree was prepared to take home. Then we would go to the store, buy new pajamas, and go home and decorate the Christmas tree and ready the home for the upcoming holiday. Sometimes, a holiday movie may also be included. It's a day to enjoy being together and looking forward to the following month of celebration and reverenced remembrance.

Believe you me, I am excited that we've kicked off the Christmas season and that no holiday is in the way between now and Christmas! Bring on the Christmas music and wrapping paper and holiday carolers and homemade ornaments and remembering the true reason for Christmas.

P.S. For your entertainment, here is a completely random photo of a dog who looks like he's driving a car that we came across in the grocery store parking lot:

Epic.

Life is Beautiful:

It's not truly the Christmas season without this Trans-Siberian Orchestra version of Carol of the Bells (one of my favorite holiday choral pieces):

24 November

2011-11-25T02:56:00.001-07:00

Happy Thanksgiving from our family to yours!

Today I am SO thankful for being thankful! It is a great blessing to have a day reserved each year where we focus on what we are thankful for, family, and good food. I especially enjoyed looking on facebook today and learning about what my friends and family are grateful for today...my newsfeed was full of loved ones expressing thanks for what they have and what they cherish. Gratitude nourishes and makes life more meaningful, and I'm glad for that reminder today!

Thanksgiving around here was so very delightful. We had perhaps our earliest Thanksgiving dinner ever - there is always some delay with thawing or the cooking of the poor turkey taking substantially longer than it should - and we were all rather proud of ourselves for that accomplishment. We then hit the town and saw a movie that we have been anxiously awaiting (no, seriously, for a very long time):

Happy Feet Two!

We were big fans of the first film, perhaps because we spend our lives singing and dancing and accordingly identify, as well as because penguins are a sentimental thing in our family, given the relationship between fathers and their babies (delightfully re-enacted in this photo). The movie was happy and fun and got us dancing in the aisles at the end. I highly recommend it. Oh, and we just had to shoot another Breaking Dawn shot, because let's face it, my dad is as fierce as a werewolf.

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope yours was full of love and gratitude!

Life is Beautiful:

A friend reminded me of this fantastic video, which makes me want to be better at looking at the positive and thinking of each day as a new opportunity:

23 November

2011-11-24T01:52:00.001-07:00

May I just say that I love looking at the search terms that bring people to my blog on google searches? In the last 24 hours, someone came to my blog with the term "ardis broke my heart". Hahaha. I doubt I am the Ardis in question, but I apologize on behalf of all Ardises for that. And if I did break your heart, let's chat about it. We can work things out. :)

Today I am grateful for music. I don't remember - I may have expressed my gratitude previously because it's something so close to my heart - but if so, it's worth praising again. Music is a vital part of my life and brings me immense joy daily. I have a musical background in my ancestry, with choral and band conductors and music lovers in our family tree, and growing up, musical expression and performance was an integral part of my childhood. I accordingly grew to love partaking in and learning about instrumental music - mainly the piano and the violin - and choral music. In addition, listening to music of all kinds is extremely fulfilling for me. I listen to music in almost every thing that I do every day, because music is life affirming. It makes me feel alive and find meaning and enjoy experiences. Music makes my life richer, and through music I have discovered more about myself and what I love in life than through most other elements of life.

You may ask, what are some of my all time favorite songs? Although there are way too many to name here, let me share a wee bit of the soundtrack of my life:

~ A tie for my all-time favorite classical song: "Claire De Lune" by Debussy and "Gymnopedie No. 1" by Erik Satie.

~ "Shiver" by Coldplay. I listened to this pretty much on repeat most of my junior year of college. And by the way, check out a baby Chris Martin here!

~ "Galaxy" (the live version) by Jason Mraz.

~ "Hamburg Song" by Keane.

~ The Mormon Tabernacle Choir's performance of "I Believe in Christ".

~ "Dig A Pony" by the Beatles. I cannot even express how much I love the rooftop performance.

~ "Dog Days Are Over" by Florence and the Machine. You may have known this from the fact that it was the music on my blog for a very long time.

~ My favorite songs from a musical may be too numerous to count, but a few highlights include "I Dreamed A Dream" from Les Miserables (start at the 0:45 mark), "Defying Gravity" from Wicked, "Trouble Sleep, Yanga Wake AM" from Fela, and "One Song Glory" from Rent.

~ Opera: most definitely Pavarotti's "Nessun Dorma".

~ "Samson" by Regina Spektor.

~ "Green Eyes" and "Fix You" from Coldplay. Okay, everything ever written by Coldplay.

~ And I can pretty much say the same thing for Bon Iver and Iron & Wine.

~ "Never Think" by Edward Cullen. I mean, Robert Pattinson.

~ "Lazy Eye" by Silversun Pickups.

Okay, I have to stop myself there. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to drift off to sleep to Erik Satie.

Life is Beautiful:

See above.

22 November

2011-11-23T13:45:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was filled with many elements of a perfect day! Let's review:

~ Quality time with my dear father.

Even though the majority of it involved appointments, I really enjoyed having that time to be with my father. Lunch at Jason's Deli was one of my favorite moments:

us with our fruit

~ Attending the Salt Lake Temple.

It was our first time since April, and it was wonderful. What a magnificent place. Temple Square is beautiful at night, and Sarah and I even saw a proposal happen live at the reflecting pool. Which was kind of sweet and hilarious all rolled into one - sweet because they were so happy and hilarious because we felt a bit awkward for being right there.

you can't really tell, but there's so a proposal going on below on the left side of the pool

amazed at the interactive guide!

~ Seeing Breaking Dawn with two adorable girls, Josie and Carly, aka our sister twins.

We were rushing from SLC down to Utah County to see the movie and accidentally went to the wrong theatre for the late showing, and so when we got to the right theatre, it was about 15 minutes into the movie. The employee who let us in said that he couldn't run our card anymore, so he just let us in. How kind is that? And we felt happy about seeing it for free, because let's face it:

Breaking Dawn is my least favorite book in the Twilight series, and having the first half of the story as one movie = the weirdest plot line you could EVER have in a film! Oh my goodness. It was redonculous. I loved looking over and seeing Sarah and Josie with either their eyes covered or their mouths covered from shock. My favorite moment played out as follows (spoiler alert):

Dad to me (in a voice of shock and sudden realization): Wait, he's imprinting on HER?

Me: laughing hysterically, knowing that this moment in the film is deliciously ridiculous

Me to Sarah: Do you understand yet what's happening?

Sarah to me: Yeah, he's seeing Bella when she was a little girl...

Me to Sarah: No. He's imprinting on her.

Sarah (with horror in her voice): WHAT?

Oh Breaking Dawn. But it was great to be with those girls!

How we spent most of the movie:

We're fierce.

All in all, a good day.

Life is Beautiful:

Source: facebook.com via Ardis on Pinterest

21 November

2011-11-21T23:08:00.001-07:00

Today I am grateful for eating a vegetarian diet. I have been eating vegetarian (technically, pescatarian) for the past 10 months, and it has been absolutely fabulous. Not eating meat makes my body feel good and also soothes my conscious, as I've had a difficult time eating meat since my teen years. (I'm just too much of an animal lover).

Everyone has their own choices and feelings about eating meat, so it's one of those things we all can decide for ourselves. Personally, eating vegetarian makes me feel good. I tried several different levels of not eating meat, and what I've finally settled on is that I am okay eating fish and very occasionally some meat, but for the most part, I will eat vegetarian. Doing so makes me feel well and happy and I feel empowered having made this choice!

Life is Beautiful:

I cannot even begin to express my adoration for the new Coldplay video "Paradise":

20 November

2011-11-21T02:27:00.001-07:00

Today I am grateful for stake conference, and having the opportunity to gather together with a couple thousand of my brothers and sisters in the area and hear inspiring and sweet words. One of the youth got up and cited my favorite scripture, 2 Timothy 1:7, and I remembered just how much I want to live by that scripture. I am also thankful for first row seats at stake conference - oh yeah! It's pretty crazy when you look back and see the chapel, the overflow, and the gym completely full, with an overflow audience in another chapel, and think of all the people who are uniting in faith and belief. And it's also pretty great to actually be able to see the speakers.

Life is Beautiful:

I may or may not have started tearing up listening to some of the final lyrics of the last song of Les Mis this evening:

"To love another person is to see the face of God."

Okay, I did tear up. It's my favorite lyric in the musical. It reminds me of this:

"And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom;that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellowbeings ye are only in the service of your God." Mosiah 2:17

And this:

"And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have ^adone it unto one of the ^bleast of these my ^cbrethren, ye have done it unto me." Matthew 25:40

19 November

2011-11-20T01:27:00.001-07:00

Today I re-entered civilization!

Victorious!

It may have only been for a walk to lunch and to get some groceries for tonight's amazing dinner of butternut squash and quinoa stew and roast potatoes (British style), but it was grand!

What's more, I even have started physically feeling like I can do things during the day besides watching Monk episodes. Success!

Today I am grateful for moments when I was working on something, whether it's dinner or gift bags or taking photos, and suddenly realized that even the day before, I didn't have the energy to do any of those things, let alone all of the them in a single day! Those small successes remind me that my body is healing itself and I am getting better. Hurray!

{yes, this post has a lot of exclamation points! it's because I'm so happy!}

Life is Beautiful:

One of my favorite photographic styles is still life photography against a black background. It's so simple and elegant. I decided to pull out the camera and make my own screen and shoot some photographs of everyday objects. My favorite items to shoot were my charity shop bottles - they grabbed the light in beautiful ways. Here are a few of my favorites photos:

Dot exploring the photo set.

18 November

2011-11-19T00:13:00.001-07:00

You know you've been sick and out of the loop of life too long when you have to repeatedly, over the course of several days, check your calendar to see what day it is when blogging. Apparently, it is November 18th. Good to know.

{Don't worry, I think I'm on the up and up and will be better soon, so I will stop discussing being sick all the time.}

Today I am grateful for connecting with friends who you haven't spoken to in too long. I don't know where it stems from, but I have a hard time remaining in constant contact - i.e., calling often, writing emails back and forth - with my friends, even though they are people that I absolutely love and adore and miss. It's something weird that I'm always trying to improve, because I want those important to me to know it. (Friends, please know that I love you, even though I'm not the best at showing it!) Tonight it was just something simple - gchatting with one of my Cambridge friends and finally getting ourselves situated to have one another's American contact info - but it was great and reminded me that I need to get in contact with a lot of other wonderful friends of mine!

Life is Beautiful:

The fam and I were watching ANTM the other day, and they had a guest on the music video set called Keenan Cahill. I hadn't heard of him before, but he's a big youtube sensation and Sarah had seen some of his videos before. So we embarked on a youtube journey and watched a bunch of his videos. They make me smile. He has so much joy and such a fun spirit about him in his videos. He is 16 and has Maroteaux-Lamy syndrome, and so for most of his life, he has faced many difficult and expensive medical treatments, but you don't see those getting him down! Here are a few of my faves:

I don't endorse these lyrics, but I love his dancing to this:

Sweet duet with 50 Cent, starting at about 1:20 into the video:

With the Glee cast!

17 November

2011-11-18T00:59:00.001-07:00

This is my 300th blog post! That's pretty darn snazzy.

Today I am grateful for croissants. Yes, I love them. Particularly croissant sandwiches with cranberry and mandarin oranges, like I had for dinner. Delicious! I am also grateful for all of the well days that we have in life that we don't appreciate until we have unwell days. I'm looking forward to those well days again, which I'm sure will start up again soon. We don't realize how blessed we are just to feel well. Opposition helps us appreciate what we have.

Life is Beautiful:

Source: etsy.com via Ardis on Pinterest

16 November

2011-11-17T02:00:00.001-07:00

I think bronchitis just may be my kryptonite (or my copper, a la Megamind, which is a probably one of the funniest movies I've seen in the past several years, by the by). It drains all of my energy. I had to lie down after getting up from the couch to answer the front door. These effects are at a comical level, where I can laugh at myself for how out of it I feel. And so, I was a bit worried about going to BYU tonight and talking with a group of students about my experiences as an intern, because a) this was my first time trying to re-enter society since getting sick, which always is a strange experience when you've been sick and sequestered yourself and b) I was afraid that I may suddenly power down and lose all energy in the middle of the meeting and c) when I have low energy, what I say often does not make sense. I know the latter entertains my sister to no end, but I usually like to make sense when I talk about education and academia and related fields. I'm strange that way. Luckily, the meeting itself was a great thing to participate in and I think I made sense when I was talking, which is always good, even if my voice is about an octave lower than normal.

My blessing for today is the power of mentoring atmospheres and realizing the effects that they've had in influencing your life for the better, as well as having the opportunity to make your own small commitment towards the mentoring of others. I always love going back to BYU and feeling the fostering spirit of academic excellence and intellectual growth that is on campus. At BYU, and particularly in the History department, there are many professors who dedicate their lives to not only imparting knowledge in their specific subjects of expertise, but also in helping students push themselves further and develop as students and as people. I am also very grateful for the many individuals at BYU who mentored me. Much of mentoring is about unlocking the power of the individual and helping them become aware of their own abilities, as I read about in a Clayton Christensen address today. I am grateful for those individuals who helped me understand myself further, and also humbled by the experiences I've had thus far in life to help others similarly understand their own power and potential.

Life is Beautiful:

CNN always has great photo series on its site, and today they posted a series of photographs of Alzheimer's patients posing with projected images of themselves in their youth. The photographer, Gregg Segal, wanted to celebrate the individuals for the lives that they had lived and emphasize them for the people that they were as still being who they are, despite their illness. The photographs are touching and remind me of my grandma who spent the last years of her life with Alzheimer's. She was still her, in the way that she was my beloved grandmother, and I am forever grateful that she always remembered who I was, but I like to think about the person that she was before Alzheimer's and the incredible life that she lived. She is not defined by the illness that she had for the last few years of her life, but by the full life that she lived.

A few of my favorite photos by Segal:

You can view the series here.

15 November

2011-11-16T00:43:00.001-07:00

Happy birthday to my dear part-time sister (but really all-time sister) Amanda, as well as one of my longest life-long friends, Lynn!

I am grateful today for Harry Potter. The first time I heard of Harry Potter was sitting in Jody's class in 7th grade, listening to her read the first chapters of the book to us as we sat at our desks. It became one of my favorite series over the following years, and I still smile thinking about those nights getting the next book at midnight and then reading nonstop until I was done with the book sometime in the morning or early afternoon. I could read the whole series over and over again, and I do. I think it'll always be one of my favorites.

My attitude towards the movies has at times been a bit less enthusiastic. I've never adored the movies much, because you just can't capture the intricacies of the plot and the characters in a movie. I used to actually be quite against the movies until fairly recently. However, that changed when I was staying with my aunt and uncle in England near the beginning of the year. My aunt was soon to see Harry Potter part 1 with her family, and so we watched a different HP every night through the sixth film to catch up. I hadn't yet seen the sixth film, and I enjoyed getting caught up in it and the other films. So now, while I much prefer reading the books, I like the movies as well.

My dad and I just finished Harry Potter 7 part 1, and so of course we are now finally watching the second part of the 7th film. It's reminding me again how much I love the books, and I think it may be about time to start the series again...

Life is Beautiful:

This makes me smile:

Source: Uploaded by user via Ardis on Pinterest

14 November

2011-11-15T02:40:00.001-07:00

Today, I am grateful for antibiotics, and really, medicine in general. Isn't it great that there are medicines that can help us get better when we are feeling unwell, and that can speed up that natural process of the body healing itself? I found out today that I have bronchitis, which is something that my body IS NOT good at healing itself of. Twice in the past three years, I have gotten bronchitis, been told for a month that it was a cold that would go away on its own despite my own protesting, had it turn into pneumonia, and then have finally received medication when it's gotten to that point. (One of those times was in China, when I found out after that I had had pneumonia while traveling around the country and competing with NMUN. Once I came back and was diagnosed, it suddenly became clear exactly why I had been feeling so unwell, and I felt kind of proud of myself of doing it all with pneumonia.)

If I can climb the Great Wall with pneumonia, I can do anything!

BUT,

I've had bronchitis for a week, and my doctor prescribed me antibiotics today, rather than a month from now.

WHICH MEANS,

that I will get better in probably the next week and a half.

WHICH ALSO MEANS,

that while I feel extremely unwell at the moment, it's not going to be perpetual and I will get better sooner rather than later.

HALLELUJAH!

Life is Beautiful:

I think this scripture on hope and faith is very pertinent in understanding the need of faith as a mode of knowledge:

"For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for?
But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it."
Romans 8:24-25

And this quote from C.S Lewis' The Screwtape Letters is a personal favorite, talking about why God gives us adversity, and also why there are times when we feel that we are doing things on our own:

"He leaves the creature to stand up on its own legs - to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish. It is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature He wants it to be."

12-13 November

2011-11-14T00:58:00.001-07:00

I am grateful for:

~ My kind sister being willing to go and get sick food for me and dinner supplies for the family, which is something that I'm supposed to be helping with but haven't been well enough to do.

~ When days seem to go quickly when you're sick, because it feels like it'll be that much quicker to when you're feeling better again.

Sorry, not much else to share, except for the fact that I can now name every single episode that each clip from the Monk introduction/theme song montage is from. Wellness, please come soon!

Life is Beautiful:

Beautiful.

Source: proclamationpictures.blogspot.com via Ardis on Pinterest

11 November

2011-11-11T16:39:00.001-07:00

I am sick. Maybe there should be a rule that you can't be sick on days as cool as 11/11/11? That would be a great rule! I am sad to realize that I spent my 11:11 am at 11/11/11 unceremoniously watching an episode of Bones to catch up. If my sick-inflicted mind would have remembered, I would have done something much more memorable, like danced outside barefoot or held hands with all of my family members or declared my love to someone. But I am so looking forward to 11:11 tonight. I may just set my cell phone alarm to make sure I remember.

Since I am sick and can't do anything about it, I decided today to revel in all things that you do when you're sick. So,

I watched Monk and Bones.

I ate something extremely random - creamy and delicious KFC mashed potatoes and coleslaw - at a time that was neither breakfast nor lunch.

I made some finishing touches for memory books of my dear cousin.

I fantasized about life and the future (and mainly London. I am fantasizing about moving to London like crazy right now. I miss that beautiful city!)

I considered being too ambitious in my plans for the day and then realized that I should pull it back a bit (i.e., not getting up at 5 to join the line for the opening of H&M at Fashion Place Mall today).

I had way too much fun taking photos of myself, despite the backlighting.

Me and the Eiffel Tower! It was a valiant try. These effects never seem to work.

Do you like my guest star in the photo above?

I enjoyed the fact that pets are rather cuddly creatures and sometimes just seem to know when you're feeling unwell.

I listened to calming music (Bon Iver/Coldplay) and relaxed.

Sick days can be frustrating and get old rather quickly and you definitely don't want them to repeat themselves very much. But, sometimes, they force you to enjoy some simple things in life (and today, I think I'm too dizzy today to enjoy the non-simple things). Enjoying the simple things - that's why I'm grateful for sick days today.

Life is Beautiful:

I appreciated this CNN photo article on the faces of veterans from WWII as a way to remember Veteran's Day and the women and men that have fought and dedicated themselves to the causes of our nation.

photograph by Tom Sanders

You can see this photo series here.

And let me add another face of WWII: that of my grandmother, who sold thousands of dollars in war bonds during the war and supporting a fiancee fighting in the Pacific theater.

10 November

2011-11-11T00:05:00.001-07:00

Life is so good. Sometimes in life we have to remind ourselves of this fact, my blessing for the day, and I have had to reaffirm it to myself several times lately when I begin to think about the future and the present and what I want to accomplish in life. Those thoughts can occasionally muddle how we view ourselves and what we think, and I find myself needing to push those thoughts away and just concentrating on what I find most important in my life. And that is optimism.

I currently feel very unsure about my present position. There are things that I know, that I absolutely am certain of, that I know must be a part of my life at any given time. These include:

~ family and friends
~ the Gospel
~ the temple
~ doing something that makes a difference for others
~ filling my life with things that I find fulfillment from
~ opportunities for growth and adventure in something that makes me excited for life
~ serving others
~ continually learning
~ taking care of myself and managing my pain

I have been looking at employment opportunities in the state, around the country, and in the UK for the past several months. I know that the above are vital to what opportunity I eventually want to pursue, but I am still looking for that right experience to pursue. There's a lot of uncertainty involved. However, I find comfort that I will figure out what's right for right now and that whatever it is, it's going to be amazing. And that's what I'm remembering right now.

Life is Beautiful:

So calming.

9 November

2011-11-09T21:27:00.002-07:00

I am grateful for guilty pleasures. You know, those songs that come on the radio or videos you watch or things that you have to dive in to every once in a while. Let me share a few of my favorite guilty pleasures with you.

~ I have loved "Come on Eileen" by Dexy's Midnight Runners since I was a young girl watching Pop Up Videos (which, by the way, has been recently revived on VH1, but either it's gotten a bit more sketchy or I didn't get the sketchiness in my youth). I mean, can anything get any better than that tune and those overalls?

~ Another thing I have adored since youth is Meatloaf's "I Would Do Anything For Love". I had a prolonged dream throughout my teen years that I would choreograph a dance to the prolonged introduction of the song that would feature a contrasting scene between ballet dancers performing to the classical element of the song and tap dancers dancing to the rock aspects of the song, and then the two groups would eventually become more and more integrated into one beautiful piece by the beginning of the vocals. It was going to be EPIC. This is one of those songs that Sarah and I sing at the top of our lungs, still censoring certain parts as we did as kids.

~ I could read Twilight and Eclipse over and over and over. I get sucked into those two books, and one of my favorite non-academically related memories from my Cambridge summer programme was sitting in the King's Fellows Garden for hours and reading Twilight. However, I strongly dislike New Moon and Breaking Dawn. Those books make me cranky.

~ There are certain movies that I love to watch when I need a pick-me-up. Probably one of my all-time favorites for this is Matilda, probably the cutest movie ever produced. Others include Hello Dolly, Mrs. Doubtfire, The Wedding Planner, My Best Friend's Wedding, Phenomenon or Michael (due to John Travolta), and George of the Jungle.

~ One of my favorite scenes in Glee's three seasons was Will Schuester singing "Tell Me Something Good" to Sue Sylvester. The looks on Sue's face are hilarious, and it doesn't hurt that Matthew Morrison is just excessively attractive. It's also one of my favorite songs to belt in the car as we're driving. P.S. This video is rather long - just watch through the song. And what the goodness is going on with those comments in the video?

~ I love looking at wedding photographs and wedding ideas, and could spend a good portion of time on the wedding & events section of pinterest. And some days I do.

~ Queen, of course, is one of the best groups ever. They had so many hits and were so dynamic and vibrant. Of all of their songs, I think I get the biggest smile on my face from "Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy":

~ The last one I'll share today is a fab scene and dance from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. Unfortunately, I can't find a link to embed the video, but you can find it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7h-2UmHuxQ.

Life is Beautiful:

Source: nicoleinani.tumblr.com via Ardis on Pinterest

8 November

2011-11-09T02:17:00.001-07:00

My blessing for the day: sweet deals. I love getting a good deal. One of my favorite places for deals is Shutterfly. They send out frequent promotion codes and short sales, and they've had a recent promotion for a large percentage off of photo books. Because I was feeling a bit unwell today, I decided that it would be good to dedicate the day to putting together a photo book of our family's Europe trip this summer. I just finished it and I'm VERY excited for us to have a scrapbook of our trip together! Oh, and it was for like 50 percent off. Holla!

By the by, be prepared for an awesome post tomorrow. I will be featuring some of my (blessing spoiler alert!) favorite guilty pleasures, and so the post will be full of pure amazing enjoyment.

Life is Beautiful:

I greatly prefer the Twilight books to the movies (except for the fourth book, which I just dislike overall). But one thing that I love about the movies is the accompanying soundtrack. Twilight movies feature great music. I sampled this song on iTunes today and I think I've fallen in love:

7 November

2011-11-08T02:32:00.003-07:00

As an intern at the Church History Library, each week I enjoyed looking at the acquisitions bookshelf to familiarize myself with books new to the library. One week, I came across The Blue Tattoo by Margot Mifflin, a biography on the life of Olive Oatman, a woman and member of a LDS splinter sect who was abducted by a group of Native Americans and essentially adopted into another tribe for years before being reintroduced into Western society. Olive Oatman received a prominent blue tattoo on her chin while with the Mohave, and was known throughout the US afterward for her tattoo and her story.

I enjoyed reading about Olive Oatman in Mifflin's book, and out of interest I looked at the list of repositories visited to check for the CHL. I was surprised to find that she had not visited the Library, and so I decided to check our catalogue for any Oatman material. What I came across was amazing - a full Oatman collection with correspondence between Olive and her aunt and between many other family members for several generations. The letter between Olive and her aunt was particularly illustrative and rich with historic meaning. With the encouragement of two of my coworkers at the CHL, I emailed the author to let her know that the library held the collection and to pass along information about the collection's contents. We emailed back and forth several times, and with the coordination of one of the greatest historical consultants in the world who I worked with in the division, we were able to scan the entire collection and send the materials to Mifflin, along with transcriptions of the materials that the missionaries at the Library worked on extensively. She was working on a paperback edition of the book coming out this year and decided to include the material in a new postscript. It was a great experience to communicate with her and to be able to provide those great and illuminating historical sources.

I knew that the new edition was coming out this year, and so I have been looking forward to seeing the new postscript but had not been able to access a copy until today, when I decided to see if the BYU Bookstore had the new edition. Well, imagine me tickled when I came across, under the acknowledgements headed by "I could not have written the book without the guidance of the following librarians and archivists" to include my name and the CHL! I then turned to the postscript, in which Mifflin did a great job of discussing how the letter between Oatman and her aunt illustrated their close relationship and positive aspects of Oatman's later life. A part of the introduction reads, "Since The Blue Tattoo was published in 2009, dozens of readers have contacted me to respond to, elaborate on, and occasionally, challenge elements of it....But when a librarian at the LDS Church History Library and Archives in Salt Lake City sent me the letter transcribed below, she changed the story, providing a happy postscript to a painful saga." She then discusses the significance of the letter. Interacting with Mifflin and working together as a staff to provide the materials for her was a great professional experience.

So, what I'm a trying to say is my blessing for the day is how exciting it is to be acknowledged for the first time in a scholarly work, to have been able to contributed pertinent historical information to the record, and to have had the chance to contribute and bring attention to the collections of the CHL.

Other blessings for the day: visiting with important and great people around BYU, seeing Miss Courtney, delivering belated birthday presents, reminiscing on Cambridge, first dinner and games back with the cousins at their old new place, and dancing babies.

Life is Beautiful:

Treasure every moment.

Source: pinworthy.blogspot.com via Ardis on Pinterest

6 November

2011-11-07T01:38:00.003-07:00

A few facts:

~ Compliments make my day. No, my week, and sometimes my year. I love receiving compliments, not in a vain way, but in a thanks-for-noticing-and-saying-something-kind-and-I-am-very-grateful way. I will remember a compliment for a long time and base much of my self confidence off of compliments, whether academic or personal. (Is this bad? Unsure. But it's so true.) I also associate compliments with certain places or certain people, like how I associate a certain pair of shoes with the Creamery on Ninth and a person from my childhood. Today someone told me that I was a natural teacher and asked if I was interested into education, and I was positively tickled. I am shelving that compliment as church hallway, primary worker.

~ The Spirit of God is one of my favorite hymns. It makes me want to shout from the rooftops and reminds me of my days in Nauvoo.

~ One of my biggest pet peeves is when people at church do not sing hymns with dedication or even at all. I've loved serving several times as a chorister in different wards, and unfortunately as a chorister standing at the front you can see the vast number of people who aren't singing. Singing hymns is a way of praising the Lord, and as the scripture says, you can make a joyful noise to the Lord, so musical talent is not necessary for such praise.

One of the sweetest experiences in a calling for me was as the Relief Society Music Leader in one of my Utah wards. When I first began, I noticed that there were a lot of sisters who weren't singing during Relief Society. I decided to do what I could do in my calling to help increase the love of singing in our ward, and prayed frequently for help from Heavenly Father. Over the next year, during each five minute music period, we would read a scripture or a quote from Church leaders on the significance of music in worship, sang the favorite hymns of sisters, and approached hymns from new and different ways. I realized, shortly before I moved out of the ward and was finished with my calling, that everyone had started to sing in our meeting, and that there was a sweet spirit and reverence for singing hymns. It was a very good experience in service and reaffirmed to me the importance of music in showing our gratitude to God.

~ Sarah and I discovered that the Christmas radio station has started up, and I'm more than a little excited to start thinking about Christmas.

~ I want to fly to London. Right now.

That is all.

Life is Beautiful:

In chapter 19 of Job in the Old Testament, Job is relating his many afflictions and trials, when he shares:

"For I know that my redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth:
And though after my skin worms destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see God:
Whom I shall see for myself, and mine eyes shall behold, and not another; though my reins be consumed within me." ~ Job 19:25-27

If Job can remember that and put that knowledge at the forefront of his life, I can too.

5 November

2011-11-05T20:56:00.000-06:00

Happy Guy Fawkes Day! One year ago, I was standing in the pouring rain watching fireworks and enjoying a bonfire with the Young Single Adults of the Cambridge Ward, whom at the time I was just getting to know but whom ended up becoming some of my closest friends and favorite people. I have to admit, I wish that I was in the UK today to celebrate with my friends there!

I am grateful today for accomplishing goals. My goal I accomplished today was going to the temple every day this week, visiting a different temple every day! It was a wonderful experience and reaffirmed my testimony in the temple. Sarah and I went to the Bountiful Temple, which is up on the mountain, higher up than the Draper Temple. Because it snowed last night, the mountains were beautifully snowy and the views down into the valley were beautiful. I may occasionally dislike the snow, but I do admit that I love snow-covered trees and mountains and houses.

We saw two newly married couples at the temple and were a wee bit jealous of how their wedding photos will turn out - I'm sure that they were beautiful with the snow! What a great day to be married.

Life is Beautiful:

So, one of my favorite songs of all time is "Green Eyes" by Coldplay. I love love love this song (with about a million more loves). I think it is calming, romantic, and exquisite, so much so that I really want it to be my wedding song. The problem is that it frequently refers to a person with - you guessed it - green eyes, and perhaps since my eyes are not green that might be kind of strange? Oh, but I love it so much. The jury's still out on that, and maybe I should actually choose my wedding song with my future husband-to-be, but no matter - it's still one of the best songs ever written. Make your soul happy and listen to this:

4 November

2011-11-05T11:55:00.002-06:00

Yesterday, Sarah and I went to the Jordan River Temple, the temple near where my Grandma Ardis lived. We went in the evening, and when we walked out, we were greeted by the first snow fall we've seen this season. It was pretty magical, walking out of the temple and seeing snow cascade gently down in front of the stained glass windows of the temple. I wish I had a better camera with me to capture that exact moment, but I can see it still in my mind. It was beautiful!

you can almost see the snow here:

My blessing for the day: cooking. Sarah and I are making dinner every night this month and we are having so. much. fun. The day's dinner was simple: BLTs, with angel food cake, strawberries, and sugar-free cool whip for dessert. Well, BALTs, or BLTAs, ABLTs, or however you want to add that delicious A for avocado. But it's fun to get in the kitchen and cook and create something delicious and then enjoy it together.

Life is Beautiful:

One of my new favorite scriptures:

Even unto them will I give in mine house and within my walls a place and a name better than of sons and daughters: I will give them an everlasting name, that shall not be cut off.

And also the sons of the stranger, that join themselves to the Lord, to serve him, and to love the name of the Lord, to be his servants, every one that keepeth the sabbath from polluting it, and taketh hold my covenant;

Even them will I bring to my holy mountain, and make them joyful in my house of prayer: their burnt offerings and their sacrifices shall be accepted upon mine altar; for mine house shal be called an house of prayer for all people.

~ Isaiah 56:5-7

And also this set of verses:

And ye shall offer up unto me no more the shedding of blood; yea, your sacrifices and your burnt offerings shall be done away, for I will accept none of your sacrifices and your burnt offerings.

And ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit. And whoso cometh unto me with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, him will I baptize with fire and with the Holy Ghost, even as the Lamanites, because of their faith in me at the time of their conversion, were baptized with fire and with the Holy Ghost, and they knew it not.

Behold, I have come unto the world to bring redemption unto the world, to save the world from sin.

Therefore, whoso repenteth and cometh unto me as a little child, him will I receive, for of such is the kingdom of God. Behold, for such I have laid down my life, and have taken it up again; therefore repent, and come unto me ye ends of the earth, and be saved.

~ 3 Nephi 9:19-22

2-3 November

2011-11-04T03:52:00.003-06:00

Sarah and I just finished making 30 felt Santas for the Festival of Trees. One might think that doing so would be relatively easy and not too time consuming - which may be perhaps why one might have signed up to produce 30 - but the task took a bit more time than expected, which is why it is now rather late in the evening/early in the morning, so it's going to be a quick blog post and then off to bed. Although it was a lot of work, we're glad we did it, and look how darn cute they turned out:

Crafty service is the best!

The past two days have brought two more opportunities to visit the temple. Wednesday was the Mount Timpanogos Temple, with my dear sister:

Today was my first visit to the Oquirrh Mountain Temple, which is perched on the southwestern edge of the Salt Lake Valley and offers beautiful views over the valley from its grounds:

Blessings:
~ Passing time in difficult or lengthy circumstances through fun and enjoyable games. Our personal favorite of present is Family Feud (check it out - or don't, because it's a wee bit addicting). That game can sure help pass the time in situations where time needs to be passed.

~ The crisp, beautiful skies of Utah year round. One of my favorite things about this beautiful state is that no matter the season, the sky is almost always open and clear and blue, with the sun shining down. I would say that is perhaps the biggest difference between Oregon and Utah that I appreciate. The beauty of Oregon is so refreshing and life affirming to me, but it is difficult sometimes on gray and cloudy days, whereas those rarely happen here. Oregon and Utah are both beautiful; just a very different type of beautiful. It took me about six years of living in Utah to finally be able to admit that.

Life is Beautiful:

I've been thinking about this saying a lot lately. Not in a historical-past kind of way, but instead in a processing-and-accepting-life-as-it-happens-and-is-and-enjoying-all-I-can manner. It's profoundly simple and deep:

Source: weheartit.com via Ardis on Pinterest

We sometimes think of the past as something in the far distance, that happened 100 years ago or 50 years ago, but I am realizing more and more that part of life is understanding and processing the idea of anything that has happened before this moment is in the past. This idea is freeing, when we consider that it means that we accept what has happened previously, and can use it to educate our paths in the future, but that we can let go of it as the past in relation to our own personal worries and difficulties. We can't affect the past anymore, but we can affect the future.

1 November

2011-11-02T01:42:00.000-06:00

Happy November!

Mother nature celebrated here by draping snow over the mountains. The snow and the frigid air remind me of the impending snowy winter that will inevitably come. I promised myself that I would never again live in winter weather, but alas, that promise will not be holding true this year. And although I dislike the slipping and the poor roads and the ice, I do love many of the things that are associated with winter - curling up with apple cider, warm blankets, the freshness of cold air.

I celebrated the start of the month by going to the Draper Temple. This week, I'm accomplishing two goals I've wanted to pursue for quite some time - a) to go to the temple every day for a week, and b) go to a different temple every day. Yesterday was the Provo Temple {it's so great that they're open in the morning on Monday!}, and today I went to the Draper Temple.

{I forgot to take a photo of the Provo Temple Monday, but the day was as crisp as it is here.}

In the Scriptures, we are frequently told that the temple is the mountain of the Lord. That symbolism is always reaffirmed to me in Utah, where the temples are literally next to the mountains, often set on hills so you can see them from far away. The Draper Temple even further embodies that symbolism, as it is actually on the side of the mountain, nestled up in one corner of the valley. Driving up the mountain, you know that you are driving up to the House of the Lord.

My blessing for today is when you finally put into words something that you've thought of and perceived for quite some time. The Draper Temple is up on the mountainside, overlooking all of the valley. As I was driving up the mountain, I looked out at the view and was just taken aback at how beautiful it was. It's a feeling that I've experienced any times before, and I suddenly realized that the exact feeling was of awe. That's a feeling that I want to have all my life - awe and amazement at the world - and I also realized that I want to live my life in awe, appreciating all that is around.

Life is Beautiful:

"Beautiful people do not just happen":

Thanks, Pinterest.

30-31 October

2011-11-01T00:14:00.001-06:00

Happy Halloween, y'all!

Halloween has never been my favorite holiday - partially due to my dislike of spooky, horror, and zombies - but I do think it is fun that we have a day in society where it's acceptable and encouraged to dress as someone or something else. Sarah and I had a great time today, sitting in the Cougareat at BYU and people-watching to see the costumes around campus. We saw some hilarious costumes. Our favorites were a stone angel, the prince from Tangled (he was an extremely handsome cartoon-looking character), a facebook profile, and the best of all - a Transformer, who actually transformed from robot into car and back in the middle of the Cougareat, to the applause of everyone around.

Two blessings for the past couple days:

~ The sweetness of Primary children during singing time.

~ The strength of prayers and positive thoughts from others. We've had a lot of support from others in relation to my father's health, and I'm going to ask for continued support from you all! If you could pray for my dad, or send positive thoughts into the universe on behalf of him, that would be great and most appreciated! I know that there is power in doing such, and I've seen the direct result of that many times in my life. Thanks in advance! :)

Life is Beautiful:

I thought this was pretty fabulous:

Source: a5.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net via Ardis on Pinterest

29 October

2011-10-30T00:49:00.000-06:00

Fact:

I have the coolest extended family that a girl could possibly have.

I mean, formal and informal family get-togethers + calling each other faux names + clothespins + pink jello salad + celebration of dear relatives and new stages of life + getting to talk with one another + examples of eternal familial love + bonfires + night soda baseball and the introduction of soda golf + roasted marshmallows + snuggling with a sweet baby + playing barbies and mickey and minnie + listening to sweet tunes = a day well spent with the family.

My particular blessing today is the tradition of having baby showers and bridal showers. I LOVE going to showers. I love that they are a celebration of a new part of life for the person being honored and that they allow us to gather together as women and celebrate our womanhood. Baby showers like the one for my dear cousin today are especially wonderful, when they are filled with love and respect and advice and sweet excitement.

I love my family. I know that I always want to be near to them, because some of the best moments in life, moments in which I feel the depths of the meanings of life and of eternity, occur when I am with them.

Life is Beautiful:

I am currently going through a period where I am thinking a lot about what I want to do and where I want to be in my life, and especially to the point of what I treasure and what I want to accomplish. It's involved a lot of soul searching, and although I do not yet know where exactly it will take me, I have reached a place where I remember that which brings me happiness and excitement and what makes me feel like me, and I know that is always what I want to pursue in life. The three main points are:

1. To live in harmony with my Heavenly Father's teachings and in faith
2. To be around my family and experience life with them
3. To remember my passion for life, education, and the world, and to make sure that all major decisions and things that I pursue in life fall in line with what brings me joy and fulfills that passion

I came across this on pinterest and it helped reaffirm that third point to me:

Source: gotbyouthblog.tumblr.com via Ardis on Pinterest

Everything I have accomplished so far in life has been directly because of adherence to these three principles. I'm excited to keep them in mind in my next major life decisions!

24-28 October

2011-10-29T11:39:00.001-06:00

Bliss is:

~ sitting in bed with a cute kitty washing herself on your lap

~ going on walks around town with beloved family members

~ smashing soda cans with a baseball bat

{look at that view! so life affirming!}

~ studying standardized test materials just for fun

~ seeing an adorable movie, Puss in Boots, with the family. {Baby Puss in Boots melted my heart.}

~ the knowledge that everything is going to be okay and that God is there

Life is Beautiful:

Sometimes you need something that'll make you smile, and boy howdy, a combination of a favorite childhood character and our favorite line from a song is perfect to do just that:

Source: iwastesomuchtime.com via Ardis on Pinterest

Hahaha. Soooo funny.

18-23 October

2011-10-23T23:55:00.003-06:00

Here are a few of my favorite blessings this week:

~ Attending the Jordan River temple for the first time!

~ Visiting places that you associate with positive memories of a loved one. My Grandma Ardis, whom I was named after, lived next door to the Jordan River temple before she passed away. She had a beautiful view of the temple from her window, and I remember how magical the Jordan River temple seemed to me and the connections I made with my Grandma Ardis. When I went to the temple, I walked over to where my grandma lived and reminisced, thinking about walking outside together and looking into the parlour where we sat together. It made me smile, and I felt that perhaps my grandma was there with me.

~ The annual drive to see the changing colors in the mountains. Sarah and I were able to go along with our parents and our dear Nola and Gary on Friday to drive along the Alpine Loop and enjoy the colors painted across the mountains. It was a great thing to be with these people that I love, as well as to see the beauty of this world that God created for us.

~ That nature speaks to God's existence. When I see the beauty of the mountains, I know that He is real and He loves us.

~ Nola and Gary, for so very many reasons. They are some of my dearest family members and I treasure every moment that I am with them.

~ Fall leaves. In my desire to hold on to summer, I forget how beautiful autumn is.

~ Living experiences through the eyes of children. We went with our awesome cousins to a corn maze that is practically in our backyard, and while it is fun to get lost in a corn maze and go on a hay ride with people dressed up as cartoon characters throwing candy at you, it is so much more enjoyable when you know that a certain little girl with you is LOVING it.

Oh, and as a thank you for reading this long catch-up post, here's a photo just for fun:

Life is Beautiful:

Today we had a great lesson in Relief Society about the temple, and I enjoyed hearing the testimonies from the women in our ward about temple work and sacrifice. {My favorite point - sacrifice means "to make holy"}.

One of my favorite British things is the WWII mantra "Keep Calm and Carry On," and I normally dislike knock-off quotes {keep calm and eat a cupcake? Really?} But here is one that I found that I love:

Source: pattytrends.blogspot.com via Ardis on Pinterest

So true, so true.

"As we come unto Christ and journey to higher ground, we will desire to spend more time in His temples, because the temples represent higher ground, sacred ground."

—Joseph B. Wirthlin

17 October

2011-10-18T00:11:00.000-06:00

Today, I am grateful that General Conference is so readily available on the internet! I can't remember if I discussed this before, but because I was at a training in New York, I was only able to watch one session of General Conference. I've been catching up since then. Today as I watched it for an hour, and the words brought so much comfort and peace to me. One of my favorite talks I listened to was President Dieter F. Uchtdorf's talk on "You Matter to Him." One of my favorite parts:

"[P]lease understand that what you see and experience now is not what forever will be. You will not feel loneliness, sorrow, pain, or discouragement forever. We have the faithful promise of God that He will neither forget nor forsake those who incline their hearts to Him. Have hope and faith in that promise. Learn to love your Heavenly Father and become His disciple in word and in deed.Be assured that if you but hold on, believe in Him, and remain faithful in keeping the commandments, one day you will experience for yourselves the promises revealed to the Apostle Paul: 'Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.'"

And another:

"The Lord doesn’t care at all if we spend our days working in marble halls or stable stalls. He knows where we are, no matter how humble our circumstances. He will use—in His own way and for His holy purposes—those who incline their hearts to Him.

God knows that some of the greatest souls who have ever lived are those who will never appear in the chronicles of history. They are the blessed, humble souls who emulate the Savior’s example and spend the days of their lives doing good."

Thanks, President Uchtdorf, for reminding me that God loves us and where our priorities should be in life.

Life is Beautiful:

This song came on shuffle during our family card game this evening, and I remembered just how beautiful and relaxing it is:

16 October

2011-10-17T10:49:00.002-06:00

Blessing: when you go to church and what is said is exactly what is on your mind and you need to hear.

Life is Beautiful:

This is one of my favorite scriptures, which reminds us of Christ's Atonement and His love for us:

Source: weheartit.com via Ardis on Pinterest

The King James Version of the scripture, along with the accompanying verses next to it, is my personal favorite:

"Sing, O heavens; and be joyful, O earth; and break forth into singing, O mountains: for the Lord hath comforted his people, and will have mercy upon his afflicted.

But Zion said, The Lord hath forsaken me, and my Lord hath forgotten me.

Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.

Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me."
Isaiah 49: 13-16

15 October

2011-10-16T02:28:00.002-06:00

Today was another difficult day. What helped me greatly, and what I'm considering as a great blessing, is when, during those hard days, you have brief moments where you realize to yourself, "at this moment, things are okay." And they are. And they start to happen more and more frequently, and bit by bit you can feel your internal gauge of how you are and how you feel being influenced in a positive manner.

Perhaps one of the sweetest moments today where this occurred was when I was working on the computer and I suddenly realized that my cat Dot was cuddled into my lap in a perfect ball, sleeping peacefully. I did not remember her climbing onto my lap (she has a way of doing so rather sneakily, in some way I will never understand), and I realized at that moment life was okay. And is okay, because it is. It is more than okay, even. It is exquisite.

Life is Beautiful:

"On that Friday the Savior of mankind was humiliated and bruised, abused and reviled.

The despair did not linger because on Sunday, the resurrected Lord burst the bonds of death. He ascended from the grave and appeared gloriously triumphant as the Savior of all mankind.

Each of us will have our own Fridays - those days when the universe itself seems shattered and the shards of our world lie littered about us in pieces. We will all experience those broken times when it seems we can never be put together again. We will all have our Fridays.

But I testify to you in the name of the One who conquered death - Sunday will come. In the darkness of our sorrow, Sunday will come. No matter our desperation, no matter our grief, Sunday will come."

- Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin

I find peace in the knowledge that the Savior understands the pain we feel, the sorrow we feel. What I even forget to explicitly think about is that He even suffered death and can be empathetic towards those whose lives are touched by death. He rose gloriously, and although we all will at one point experience death, we have the promise of resurrection through Him. We will rise triumphant, just as He did.

14 October - Celebrating Marcus

2011-10-15T11:05:00.002-06:00

Yesterday, we gathered together as a family in Logan and celebrated the life of my cousin Marcus. It was a very tender day, filled with many sweet moments, sad moments, and strong spiritual confirmations. I was amazed and comforted by the strength of Marcus's parents, wife, and siblings, and reminded of the love and peace that the Lord extends to those who are in times of sorrow and trial. That was my blessing for the day - that our Heavenly Father provides peace, comfort, and the ability to continually grow in acceptance and remembrance, to His children, and that through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, all can be forgiven and all will be okay. The Atonement was something that was on my mind quite a lot yesterday - how blessed we are that we can all return to our Savior's presence and be resurrected, and that we can all have eternal peace and happiness. I know that my cousin Marcus has returned and can have peace and strength in the most loving atmosphere imaginable.

It was reaffirmed to me that family is the most important thing that we can cherish in this life. I saw how Marcus cherished his family throughout his life, and could feel that love and dedication that he still has for his family now at the services yesterday. Being with our family yesterday was a way that we could all remember and support one another in our pain and our hope. I feel that I don't always do the best at expressing it, but I love my family and celebrate in the fact that we will all be together eternally.

There were many, many touching moments at Marcus's funeral, and one that I think I will always remember was seeing how many people Marcus had touched in his lifetime. During the viewing, as I walked out of the Relief Society room, I looked down the hall and saw a long line of people waiting to enter. As I walked down the line, I came to realize that the line spanned the entire distance from the RS room, at one end of the church, to the doors of the church at the other end of the building, and actually went into the chapel, where there were also many people already seated.

Later, as we were leaving the funeral, I looked out over the group of people who had gathered to respect Marcus, and was touched by the sea of loving individuals who stretched back to the overflow of the chapel. I wish so much that Marcus could have perceived the number of people whose lives he had affected and influenced for the better during this life. However, I did feel yesterday that Marcus was present and could see the love and respect shown him.

Another aspect of yesterday that I will always remember is that my cousin Pierco, Marcus's wife, is an amazing woman who is built upon the foundation of Christ, as discussed in Helaman 5:12. Her spiritual strength and love of her husband was an example to me of how I want to live my life and who I want to be. I am grateful, as I know that all of my family is, that she is a part of our family.

Marcus was buried in a beautiful, small cemetery in Cache Valley. The cemetery is up on a hill and overlooks the valley. I am grateful that my cousin has such a beautiful place for his resting place until the Resurrection.

Marcus, we love you and appreciate all that you taught us, including that Life is Beautiful and how to be good and stuff. I look forward to the time when we are all together again and I can get to know you better. Take care, and as a family member said yesterday, I look forward to seeing the mansions that you are preparing for the family, as I know that they will be amazing, you intelligent man, you.

13 October

2011-10-13T22:02:00.000-06:00

Today I am grateful for the specific promises of the temple and the peace that is found from attending the temple. Today was a difficult day for me, thinking about my cousin. I'm gaining perspective and remembering the eternal view of life, which the temple helps me to concentrate on. And also the knowledge of eternal families helps comfort my heart, knowing that we will see him again.

I'm also grateful for brief moments when you comprehend something as being beautiful, lovely, and life-affirming. I had sudden moments like that today, when I was feeling sad and then suddenly was struck by the beauty of the world around me.

p.s. Happy birthday Andrew!

Life is Beautiful:

Sarah and I were touched by this version of one of my favorite songs, "Fix You," that was on Glee last week. Normally, I don't like recreations of my favorite songs, but I liked the instrumentation of this version, and most of all, the beginning of the video is very, very sweet. I've never thought about it until this, but the lyrics do work as a prayer. Enjoy it here {complete with Portuguese subtitles for some crazy reason}:

10-12 October ~ In Loving Memory

2011-10-13T00:49:00.002-06:00

On Sunday, my dear cousin Marcus passed away. Marcus is one of the most amazing people that I know. He is extremely intelligent and extremely funny, a perfect combination of his parents. Family gatherings with Marcus were always very entertaining - full of wit and competitiveness as we talked and played games. Marcus and I share a similar zest for education, and I always enjoyed speaking with him about all things academia and intelligentsia, because of his massive intellect. He is a wonderful father and I loved watching him with his wife and his little daughter. He accomplished a lot in his life, some of which you can read about here.

To me, heaven has always been being with Marcus and his family, his siblings, and his parents. We have regular game nights all together, and they are nights full of love and fun. What I keep thinking of, that's hard for me to fully perceive, is that in this life I won't again look across the table and see Marcus's smile as we play games together as family. Now a significant part of that earthly heaven has transcended to a higher level of heaven. I am grateful for the Gospel knowledge that Marcus is at peace and with our beloved family members who preceded him, and that through the blessings of the temple and God's plan of salvation, we will all be together again. I am grateful for the blessing that through marriage, we gain relatives who feel like we've always had them. This is the case for Marcus's wife, and I am grateful that she is my cousin and I love her. I am grateful for my beloved family members, Marcus's parents and sisters. And I am deeply, deeply grateful for my cousin Marcus.

Life is Beautiful:

"The things we hope for are often future events. If only we could look beyond the horizon of mortality into what awaits us beyond this life. Is it possible to imagine a more glorious future than the one prepared for us by our Heavenly Father? Because of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, we need not fear, for we will live forever, never to taste of death again...The Savior is the Author of our Salvation." ~ President Dieter F. Uchtdorf

9 October

2011-10-10T01:26:00.000-06:00

A blessing: sharing important life opportunities with people that you've grown up with or have been a major part of your life. I cherish sharing life milestones with my beloved friends. Today's blessing is bittersweet, because I was supposed to be able to get back down to Utah today so I could share in the special day of my dear roommate Amberly and her husband Ryan blessing their son, but unfortunately things didn't work out as they were supposed to. However, I am very excited for them and proud of them!

Back here in Rexburg, we had quite the exciting day at church. Sarah's roomies attend a ward that meets on campus, and so we went with them to church for the day. Sarah is really sick and started feeling extremely unwell during the beginning of the meeting, and so she and I decided to leave so she could go rest for a bit. As we were exiting the building, the fire alarm went off. We looked at each other and decided to stay around and see if we could find her roommates, whom we knew would soon be leaving the building. We also realized that it wasn't likely that it was a fire drill, and so we wondered what the goodness was going on. We found the girls and stood around with them for a while, along with the hundreds of people outside, when suddenly a fire truck pulled up and we had to move out the way so it could drive onto the pavement outside the building. And then another truck, and another pulled up. And several police cars. And an ambulance. We were all wondering what was going on.

Meanwhile, the bishop of the ward checked to see if there was an expected timetable, and he decided that it would be good to finish fast and testimony meeting outdoors. {The fire alarm went off right in the middle of a poor girl's testimony.} We all gathered around, and they got blankets for the girls to sit on and had us on the concrete and told the boys to stand, and the sweet bishop gave his wife his coat to sit on. We then held the rest of the meeting outside, under a beautiful blue sky with white clouds. It was a great meeting and you could feel the Spirit very strongly, as we were communing with God and speaking about Him and His Son in a natural setting that all-the-more reminded us of them. At the end of the meeting, they announced that because they didn't know what set off the alarm, they were having to check every room and electrical box, and so they canceled the rest of church and sent us home, where we had some great together time. But it was an unusual experience, and just yet another example of how I've seen people in the Church take difficult or unusual circumstances and turn them into great ones.

Life is Beautiful:

I've been thinking a lot about the comments of a certain evangelical preacher against Mitt Romney and the LDS Church, and I'll admit I've been frustrated by what he said. But what I've realized is that there is no need for me to worry about people accusing the LDS Church of not being Christian, because He is the center of our religion and our Savior, and no matter what anyone else says or how they define us, I know that such accusations are baseless, as we believe in Christ.

"And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins." ~ 2 Nephi 25:26

"And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty storm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall." ~ Helaman 5:12

“Our Mediator, our Redeemer, our Brother, our Advocate with the Father died for our sins and the sins of all mankind. The Atonement of Jesus Christ is the foreordained but voluntary act of the Only Begotten Son of God. He offered His life as a redeeming ransom for us all. His mission, His ministry among men, His teachings of truth, His acts of mercy, His unwavering love for us prompt our gratitude and warm our hearts. Jesus Christ, Savior of the world—even the Son of God—was and is the ultimate pioneer, for He has gone before, showing all others the way to follow. May we ever follow Him.” ~ President Thomas S. Monson

8 October

2011-10-09T12:42:00.002-06:00

I just discovered Pinterest, and it's reminding me of one of my favorite blessings - craft projects. I love to be crafty and creative and to create things, and Pinterest allows you to (among other things) find all these neat craft projects and save them together so you can easily access them. Here are a few things I will be making soon:

Earring holder:

Source: hisforhandmade.blogspot.com via Ardis on Pinterest

I always feel like I need more easels, so I want to try this out:

Source: etsy.com via Ardis on Pinterest

I want to make one of these for our Europe trip:

Source: designaglow.com via Ardis on Pinterest

This would be fun to put in a bowl or on a mantelpiece:

Source: joyfulweddingsandevents.com via Ardis on Pinterest

I can feel the creative juices flowing already. I think I'm going to make a new goal of making something new every day.

Life is Beautiful:

I found this quote {on Pinterest} and thought it was quite nice:

“A bible that’s falling apart usually belongs to someone who isn’t.” -Charles Spurgeon

Source: lesapea.tumblr.com via Ardis on Pinterest

7 October

2011-10-08T11:24:00.002-06:00

I went to my very first rodeo last night. Which, of course, made me keep on thinking of the statement "this ain't my first rodeo," because actually, it really was my first rodeo. I went with some of the best people in Rexburg, and so I had a great time being with them. However, I think that I have discovered that rodeos may not be my personal favorite activity. As two of the cowboys were trying to rope an errant steer {who was kind of ticked, you know, after being purposefully teased and then having a human ride him} and were pulling tightly on his neck, I heard a couple of the girls behind me say something about how some people were a bit silly for thinking "let that steer go!" And it just so happened that was what I was thinking at that exact moment. After experiencing the rodeo, I've decided that I'm morally opposed to them and the treatment of animals in them and also to the idea that we're watching people being bucked around until they're thrown on the ground and maybe even trampled on. But I do heart the cute girls that I went with!

My blessing for the day: I do love moments when I realize things that are morally important to me.

Life is Beautiful:

A couple more experiments:

4-6 October

2011-10-06T19:16:00.001-06:00

I am currently in the thriving city of Rexburg, Idaho. Yesterday, as Sarah and I were driving up here, an elderly gentleman at a gas station commented to me that I needed to invest in some winter clothes. {It was a bit chilly, and I was in a dress.} I laughed and replied that it was a good idea.

Well, I'm pretty sure that he can see the future, because we woke up this morning and it was SNOWING!!!! Oh my goodness. I hadn't been expecting it, and so the extent of my warm clothes packed consist of a sparkly gold {thin} sweater and leggings for the dresses I brought with me {yes, I didn't even bring pants}. And so today was a chilly day. But the absolute best part of it, one that made it an extremely fun day despite the weather, was this:

At BYU-Idaho, students in an education- or childhood development-related major have to do a series of experiences to help them understand what it is to be disabled, and one of the experiences required is to be in a wheelchair for several hours and do several different things {open a door for yourself, get in and out of a car, wheel up a hill}. Well, two of Sarah's closest friends were signed up to do it today at the same time, which just so happened to be on the day of the first snow fall in Rexburg, and so we helped them get around campus and hung out with them during their time in their wheelchairs. It was quite the experience in the snow!

We discovered that there are definitely aspects of BYU-I that could be more handicapped-friendly. The saddest thing was, after talking about how nice it was that there was a water fountain that those in wheelchairs could use, discovering that it didn't work - only the taller fountain did.

I am grateful that my sister has such great friends. I think this is something that we all hope for our loved ones. I am thankful for the people that my sister's friends are and how good they are to her. I am also grateful that I've been able to get to know them and develop friendships with them as well.

A third thing I am thankful for: finishing something that you've worked hard on, like my neat The Little Prince mug:

Life is Beautiful:

You may know this, but I am a big fan of Apple. I support the company and have always respected Steve Jobs, and I was saddened to hear about his passing. I think that Steve Jobs was a good example of the possibilities that can exist when you dedicate yourself to creativity and constant growth. Whenever I hear about people like Steve Jobs who live good lives and are well respected, it motivates and inspires me, and so I've enjoyed reading articles and seeing memorials about Jobs. This is probably my favorite:

{from here}

3 October

2011-10-04T02:42:00.002-06:00

Today was a day of driving around Provo, Color Me Mine, Los Hermanos, and the Lion King in 3D. That about sums it up. Oh, and add lots of fun. And NMUN/NYC withdrawal.

My blessing for today is how things from your childhood cheer your heart. Sarah and I were feeling that with the Lion King tonight. I flashed back to my youth during Hakuna Matata, which was always my favorite. I hated the stampede scene just as much as I always did. And the hula - pure genius. Although something new that I pondered was Scar's scar and my own. Do you think my nephew will call me Aunt Scar in the future?

Life is Beautiful:

I love black and white photographs. I also love rich color photographs. So the new software I just discovered, Color Splash Studio, is my new favorite thing and the reason I've stayed up too late this evening. A few experiments I've done so far:

30 September - 2 October

2011-10-02T12:55:00.001-06:00

I'm sitting in the lobby of the Marriott Marquis, looking out over Times Square as I write this. Our NMUN staff training concluded today, and it was a great training and a great visit to New York City in general! Also, I just finished watching the Sunday morning session of General Conference, which was beautiful. General Conference is such a light in our lives - the opportunity to listen to prophets and followers of the Lord is outstanding and humbling.

Let me tell you a little of what I'm grateful for today:

1. It is a blessing to volunteer with an organization composed of intelligent, extremely competent, and dynamic individuals, as National Model United Nations is. The purpose of NMUN is to instill in delegates, through the modeling of UN processes, an understanding of and love for leadership, cooperation and collaboration, diplomacy, and their role as global citizens. NMUN volunteers personify this, and it's a great honor to be around individuals who similarly believe in the importance of empowering students through experiences like MUN!

2. General Conference talks that go directly to your soul, that somehow answer your questions and at the same time bring a soothing peace to your concerns. Today, Elder Robert D. Hales' talk was just this for me. {Elder Hales, I hope all will be okay!} His talk spoke to my heart. I'll post a link to it soon when such is available.

3. The Mormon Tabernacle Choir version of "I Believe in Christ." The evidence of my feeling the Spirit is often tears, and the tears were a'flowing in the closing hymn of Conference. It was powerful.

Here are some assorted photos from the past few days:

View from the N train as you cross to Manhattan:

Lincoln Center:

The Manhattan Temple! I believe that it is the quietest, most peaceful place in NYC.

Magnolia Bakery:

The LDS Temple/Church:

Talking to my dad, I looked up and saw this, and it made me kind of happy:

Best staff activity ever: Bowling.

I want to see this more than I can possibly tell you. Samuel Jackson and Angela Bassett in Mountaintop, a play about Martin Luther King, Jr.:

Life is Beautiful:

Two sample quotes from Elder Hales' talk today:

"To wait upon the Lord means planting the seed of faith."

"Let us wait upon the Lord. His blessings are eternal, not temporary."

28-29 September

2011-09-29T23:45:00.002-06:00

Have I only been in NYC for a day? Because I feel like I've been here forever. In a really good way.

I always partially forget how much I love New York until I'm here again. And then I remember that I absolutely ADORE this city and its vibrancy and character. Today we had a day where we got to taste the character of MANY different areas of NYC in two boroughs, Brooklyn and Manhattan. My blessings for today: my friend Caroline, who I adventured with, and experiencing new things that you've previously wanted to do. Come, let's visit the events of the day together:

Brooklyn Bridge Park:

Jane's Carousel, a recently renovated historic carousel right on the coast of Brooklyn across from Manhattan:

Ethiopian for lunch at Awash:

The Cathedral of St John the Divine:

The following was my favorite! A gorgeous installation that, when on inspection, proves to be made of plastic soda bottles:

Columbia University!

Walking from Columbia to Harlem

The Apollo Theater!

The Hotel Theresa, where a lot of famous performers stayed, including Paul Robeson {for more info on him, read my dissertation}, and where Malcolm X and Cassius Clay often met:

Columbia has turned the Audobon Ballroom, where Malcolm X was assassinated, into a technology building, but they've kept part of the building as a memorial to Malcolm X, who is one of my favorite historical figures. Here we are together in the base of the memorial:

A beautiful mural in the ballroom:

The original flooring from where he was killed. I've always read in historical reports that after being shot, he was rushed to the hospital but was dead when he arrived. I've always assumed that meant that it took 10-15 minutes to transport him, but the hospital is literally across the street. So horrible.

Laduree, aka a Parisian bakery that just transplanted to NYC that has the most delicious, decadent macaroons. They actually invited macaroons, apparently, and conveniently I've never had macaroons and have wanted to try them, so we figured getting them from the best bakery in the world may be a good way to go {and it so was!}

We then walked down to 45th and saw Daniel Radcliffe {aka Harry Potter} and John Larroquette in How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying, which we got fifth row tickets for in the morning at the Broadway tkts for 40% off (after waiting in line for less than 5 minutes). It was SO GOOD! Daniel Radcliffe is a hoot.

We decided to do the Stage Door thing. My success in seeing Daniel Radcliffe at the Stage Door only slightly got better this time - I used to try to catch him at the stage door for Equus when I was hanging around Piccadilly occasionally, but he didn't really actually ever do the stage door thing - but there was such a huge crowd of people that we only saw the top of his head and his bodyguard. But you know what? Seeing him on stage for 2 hours 20 minutes away is better than stage door sightings!

Tomorrow: over to Manhattan for NMUN staff training!

Life is Beautiful:

I love this quote from NieNie's post yesterday:

"It's hard enough going through it, but what if we went through the trail{s} with an attitude that "this too shall pass"? Everyone struggles, God has faith in me, I have faith in myself and I can do this. What a difference your struggle could be."

27 September

2011-09-28T00:13:00.000-06:00

I love what I refer to as "perfect combination" days. You know, when you do a few of your absolute favorite things in one day and at the end, you think to yourself, "today was kind of perfect" and "I wouldn't change anything about the day's schedule."

My perfect combo day today:

~ Temple with Mom and Sarah
~ Sushi dinner with Papa
~ Color Me Mine {is it lame I want to write Colour Me Mine so badly?} with Papa

Tomorrow: off to NYC to see one of my good friends and then staff training with the fabulous NMUN staff!

Life is Beautiful:

I may have listened to the end of Les Mis today several times just to hear this line:

"To love another person is to see the face of God."

25-26 September

2011-09-26T23:43:00.000-06:00

Today was one of those days when I woke up knowing it was going to be a rough day. Waking up with that familiar sharp, stabbing pain in the base of my head is a horrible feeling, because I know that I'll have to take it easy and that everything I do will only help the tiniest bit in managing it - none of my strategies take the pain away. Luckily, today was a flexible day and so I was able to lie down and read and rest, which is about all I can manage when I hurt like this.

Luckily, a friend's mom just loaned me The Help, a book that I've wanted to read since I first heard of the movie. And so I read it all today. That's my blessing: good books that slightly take your mind off of things. I highly recommend The Help - it's a great discussion of race and domestic life in the South in the 60s.

My blessing for yesterday was feeling connected to my personal history, the past and the present. We had a family dinner together with many of my dear family members, and then went over to visit my dear grandmother, who wasn't feeling too well. When we came into her room, she lit up and told us that she had been praying all day, and that we were an answer to her prayers. As more and more family members came into her room and we all talked about our family and our love for each other, I could closely feel that familial connection that we all have with one another and with our loved ones who have passed away.

Life is Beautiful:

Just something I'm trying to remember from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory:

"We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams."

oh, and this:

"Willy Wonka:But Charlie, don't forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he he always wanted.
Charlie Bucket: What happened?
Willy Wonka: He lived happily ever after"

{this song captures these quotes to me, but to see the magical moment go here}

19-24 September

2011-09-24T17:04:00.003-06:00

A few blessings I'm thinking about:

~ Babies

~ Entertaining parties with friends

~ Deer

~ Little kids with missing teeth, like one absolutely adorable little cousin of mine

~ Finding answers to important questions

~ Dance parties with adorable children who initiate such on their own

Life is Beautiful:

MSNBC had an article on a little puppy that was very deformed when it was born and almost killed, but with some love and attention, the dog is now doing great. The photo of this dog running makes me smile so much. I love stories like this, ones that teach you to never give up:

http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/44617504/ns/today-good_news/#.Tn5hM7-K0y4

18 September

2011-09-19T11:24:00.006-06:00

Birthdays are the best, especially if they include waking up to birthday balloons {a Smith family tradition} and the best candy poster I've ever seen + spending time with family at a little cousin's baby blessing + partying it up with some of my good friends + games all night. Throw in two new purses, some cute earrings, a slap bracelet {remember those?}, and my very own copy of Pride and Prejudice, and life. is. good.

Yes, those are princess birthday balloons. And yes, one of them sings Happy Birthday. Right on.

Life is Beautiful:
MSNBC's PhotoBlog featured a video compiled by James Drake, which features the view from the space station as it orbits the earth condensed into 60 seconds. It's mesmerizing. I especially love the lit up portions of the earth, as well as the flashes of light that you can see in storms over the ocean. For some reason, I never considered that the earth would appear so lit up from space, but of course it does.

BYU-Utah Game

2011-09-18T00:51:00.002-06:00

I'm going to forever refer to tonight's game as "the game that should not be named." At least we lost in historic proportions, right? {Here are a few sad, sad details about the game for those not around here.} First the boat race, and now this? But you know what? My dad and I had a BLAST at the game in our 11th row sideline seats!

15-17 September

2011-09-17T15:04:00.002-06:00

I love and am rather grateful for:

~ yummy substitute food that allows you to eat things that you can't or don't normally eat. I am both lactose-intolerant and vegetarian, which means that my diet can be somewhat limited. However, in the UK I could have all the yogurt I wanted to because of the soy yogurt in stores there {I'm missing it!}, and I just discovered soy corn dogs. That may sound gross, but it tastes JUST like a hot dog, but doesn't have any of that makes-my-stomach-queasy-and-my-conscience-sad meat!

~ Color photographs of the past. One of the reasons that I love history and study it is because when we approach it properly, we realize that people in the past were not individuals that we can stereotype or assume about, but instead we think of them as humans, as we are, with basic motivations and needs and desires. That makes history much more real to me. Well, one of the things that perpetuates this belief, I believe, of recent history is black and white photography. Usually when I think of a decade prior to 1970s, I think of life in black and white. However, there are some great color photographs of the past that help us think of history in living color, such as these photographs of turn-of-the-century Russia and these of New York in the 1940s. Two of my favorites:

~ The BYU-Utah rivalry. It's just so enjoyable. My dad and I are going to the game today - it's the first rivalry game I've been able to go to for three years - and I'm looking forward to it! Going to the game is always entertaining with my dad, because he has allegiance to both BYU and Utah. He says that he wins no matter who wins, but he seems to usually cheer for Utah a bit more than BYU.

Life is Beautiful:

...and so are majestic clouds.
{taken at Wasatch in Wyoming, 2004 or 2005}

12-14 September

2011-09-14T16:53:00.003-06:00

The past few weeks have included a bit of downtime, and sometimes I have a hard time with moments where I have time to think about what I want to do in the future and my next plans, etc. One day last week, I was thinking about my upcoming birthday {I'll be a quarter of a century!} and was feeling a bit dejected about things. I found myself thinking, "What do I have to show for my life and for these past 25 years?" I then started laughing to myself as I realized that is a completely ridiculous thing to say. I guess attending the temple, graduating with a master's from the top university in the world, living over a year in my life in the UK, traveling extensively, being valedictorian of my department and speaking in front of thousands of people at convocation, presenting at ten academic conferences, receiving a prize for best historical essay at St John's, being chosen three times by my peers as a top delegation as well as being a two-time national champion with BYU for NMUN, living in Nauvoo, and having the most amazing family and friends a girl could have = having accomplished a few things before the age of 25. This realization was a BIG blessing to me - it completely changed my perspective and has helped me remember that I have accomplished a lot thus far, this hard part is just a small part of life, and I'll have so many more amazing experiences in the next 25 years.

Two other blessings:
~ Living in an great community full of amazing families
~ That sometimes getting locked out of the house allows you to witness said above blessing as you are able to just sit outside and watch the world

Oh, and something else I think is great: my sister sitting on children's toys:

Life is Beautiful:
I haven't really watched America's Got Talent this season, partially because it usually drives me crazy and partially because for some crazy reason, they don't broadcast it in the UK. :) However, Sarah and I happened to watch a couple episodes recently and we have fallen in love with the dance company Silhouettes. As their name suggests, they create exquisite dances in silhouette. You'll want to skip to the 2:00 mark for the good stuff:

11 September - Remembering.

2011-09-14T16:50:00.000-06:00

As I know it was for most in our nation and much of the world this weekend, the tenth anniversary of 9/11 was a time of reflection and sober remembrance for me. My blessing for today is the gift of remembering the well-lived lives of those who died in the attacks. On Saturday night, I was watching a documentary on the events in NYC on September 11th, and the approach that the documentary took was to look at the lives and experiences of specific individuals that day. It made me think of how many people were affected, how long it would take to discuss the lives, experiences, and whereabouts of each person directly affected that day, and how it had affected our country. {The final article in the commemorative Time issue on 9/11 also really made me think}. What happened to the victims was a horrific tragedy, and they deserve perpetual historical memory for their experiences. But also, it gives me great comfort to know that we can celebrate their lives and that they are now in a place where the cares and worries of this world no longer affect them. They have returned to the God that gave them life, and He is a loving God.

I've also been thinking of 9/11 in terms of how we create historical narratives as a society. 9/11 was a personal event that affected every American and changed how many of us view the world, our country, and our fellow man. Because of that and the historical significance of that day, it will always be part of our own personal histories in addition to our national history. Thoughts and feelings have been flooding back to my mind in relation to what September 11th meant to me as it happened and immediately afterward.

September 11th was exactly a week before my 15th birthday. I was in the 10th grade. That morning, as I did every morning, I was getting ready for early morning seminary, which I had before school. I was listening to the radio in my room as I was getting ready, and the DJs on my favorite radio show, who were usually quite fun and a bit irreverent, were speaking in hushed tones. I wasn't paying too much attention to their discussion, and so when they began talking about a plane crashing into a building, I honestly thought that they were talking about a movie. {My automatic assumption of such now speaks to me of being a child and not thinking anything like that could happen or that such would even be a possibility.} It wasn't until I got into my seminary teacher's car that she explained to me what had happened - that two planes had crashed into the World Trade Center towers - and that it was not an accident.

The rest of the day seemed to be a perpetual blur of news and chaos and uncertainty as we all tried to assimilate what these events meant. We watched the news in all of my classes that day - watching as each event unfolded and ideas of what had happened and who was responsible were tossed about. It was a cacophony of concepts that seemed too dark, too impossible for my adolescent mind. Mid-day, it finally became too much for me, and I asked my teacher if I could be excused to the counselor's office so I could be away from the coverage and write in my journal about what I was feeling.

Unfortunately, what I wrote about in the counselor's office I no longer have, but I do have some of my thoughts and feelings that I recorded later in my journal for that school year. At the beginning of 2002, I wrote: "What a time we live in. I truly believe this now is the beginning of the 2nd coming...[I]t still frightens me of such people who believe that they are following God by killing us. There is not a very probably way of changing their point of view. We must continue praying for their hearts to be softened."

I was a very poetic youth and also wrote the following:

On September 11th, the whole world changed. The world as we knew it before 9-11 is gone, and will never return. Now, there is just an edge of uncertainty. The US as a superpower realizes that they can be attacked, that they are vulnerable. What scares me the most is if the US is degraded, becomes not strong and all powerful.[*]
Alot of people died on September 11th. Hundreds of thousands, millions more were affected. Are mourning. Are trying to live their everyday lives, but still are scared that something's gonna happen to them.
I will never forget that feeling of fear that I felt that week. It was total, complete fear. Like I couldn't do anything. Now it feels almost as though 9-11 didn't happen. That sounds kinda weird, doesn't it? But it doesn't feel like reality anymore."

* Believe me, this is actually not where scared 15-year-old Ardis the most. But it is VERY interesting to me now that I wrote this, that it was something that was discussed and a part of my ideology at the time. Things have changed quite a bit.

It terrified me that there could be people in the world who would want to purposefully harm others, and on that day I lost a feeling of safety that I had previously held. However, the most immediate concern to me was the fact that my dad had recently flown to Utah and was to soon return - I believe he was supposed to fly back on the 12th, if I remember correctly. My father was one of my main sources of comfort in difficult times {and still is}, and not having him there terrified me, but even more thinking of him flying back home scared me beyond any fear I had previously experienced. I wanted him home so badly but did not want him to be a situation where people could potentially harm him. He flew home three or four days later, after the air regulations were lifted. I can still remember seeing him walking from the gate through security and the tears that poured once we were together again and I knew that he was safe.

I've kept newspapers and magazines from immediately after September 11th for my posterity and as a part of my own personal history. In addition, I have the note from my teacher sending me to the counselor's office.

I am grateful that we are at a place, as a nation, where we are ten years on and can look back and remember more and more from a historical sense.

And I still believe what I drew in my journal ten years ago:

6-10 September

2011-09-13T13:42:00.002-06:00

Blessings for the last few days:

~ Internet access. It's great. Having your router break reminds you of such!

~ The Mount Timpanogos Temple

~ "I Dreamed a Dream", or my favorite song from a musical ever, which we heard Lea Salonga perform last week at BYU {she played Fantine in the twenty-fifth anniversary of Les Mis}

~ First row seats that give you such great views at said concerts:

~ Supportive, constructive criticism. When I was a TA, this was something that I tried to employ in all of my associations with students, because such feedback has the ability to inspire and support while giving valid information on how to improve. I was reminded of the power of this by my amazing USG and DG for NMUN, whose comments helped me a ton on my first draft of my background guide and whose support helps me even more! {Wondering what the goodness I am talking about? You can look around a bit here, or wait until the end of the month when I write more about this.}

~ That my dad is the best quarter machine stuffed toy retriever EVER! Like, he can actually get stuffed animals out of the machines using that horrid little claw. We went to the movie and were having a bit of fun with the quarter machines, and bam - look what he got us!

A little girl {or an adult girl's} dream!

Life is Beautiful:

Many of you have probably seen this video. A motorcyclist was trapped under a burning car in Logan, Utah yesterday, and a group of people came and lifted the car so they could pull him out. You can see how quickly the people banded together to lift the car. The CNN article says something about how "somehow" they were able to lift the 4000 lb car enough to get to him - I think I know exactly how they were able to do that!

Read about it and see the video here.http://www.cnn.com/2011/CRIME/09/13/utah.motorcycle.crash/index.html?hpt=hp_t2

5 September

2011-09-06T12:12:00.001-06:00

Yesterday, we used labor day (or as I like to call it, labour day) to rest from our labors. It was an oh so relaxing day! The day went a little something like this: catch up on Drop Dead Diva and Big Brother, a little nap, read Douglas Adam's The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, games with friends, and some more reading. My blessing for the day: that feeling when you're reading and you just love it and don't want to stop. And so you don't, until you feel your eyes start to droop and you fight for a while longer and then finally let yourself drift away, but not before reading as many lines as you can still make yourself look at. Mmm.

Life is Beautiful:
I've loved Queen for years and years - their music has such life to it. Happy 65th birthday, Mr Mercury!

{actually, I do want to life forever, just fyi}

{my guilty pleasure, and this makes me pretty happy too:}

30 August - 4 September

2011-09-04T16:59:00.001-06:00

Hello, dear friends and my dear blog, I've missed you.

The last few days have been rather busy, and I'm glad we're reunited again!

Here are a few blessings from the last week:

~amazing friends
~amazing family members
~the strong spirit of missionary work and peace that exists on the MTC grounds
~the work of the United Nations and the feeling of hope and determination that I get whenever I study it
~randomly pulling up next to friends in another car at a busy intersection and getting to catch up {it was a long light}
~the example of my gorgeous, dear sister
~the chance to be missionary companions with my sister

My beautiful sister is going to be home a bit longer before she heads out on the mission. I've grateful for the opportunity to be with her for a little bit more before she leaves. I don't know if I'm mentioned this before, but she's kind of my favorite person in the

Whole

Wide

Universe.

p.s. new blogger interface, I think we're going to be friends.

Life is Beautiful:

“It is within the capacity of each of us to become His witness. Indeed, the Lord relies on ‘the weak and the simple’ to declare His gospel.”

29 August

2011-08-30T09:41:00.000-06:00

I'm grateful for surprises. This year, my sister enters the MTC 2 1/2 weeks before my birthday, and so she decided that I needed to have an alternative birthday while she was still here. {She had her own alternative birthday with my family as well this year, since she was in Canada with her beloved Josie on her birthday}. Yesterday, I remembered that Sarah had said my "birthday" was soon, but since we hadn't talked about it in a while, and since I didn't want her to have another thing on her plate, I decided that I wouldn't remind her about it. Well, soon after, the door bell rang, and I opened the door to a cute princess balloon, some yummy raspberry pull-aparts, and a note that read "Happy Birthday to the most beautiful Princess! love, your secret admirer. P.S. A little birdie told me you had 2 b-days this year!" It was such a surprise because I didn't think that we were going to do it, but sure enough, my amazing, thoughtful sister did!

Another fun surprise: looking over at dad while we're playing games, soon after he's returned from the restroom, to discover this:

You can't say we don't have fun around the Smith household.

Life is Beautiful:

I'm reading Truman Madsen's The Temple: Where Heaven Meets Earth, and it is full of beautiful insight about the temple. My favorite point thus far:

"My cumulative experience and that of my associates demonstrates that there is such resilient joy. The temple is the place where Christ's atonement manifests to us the 'peaceable things - that which bringeth joy, that which bringeth life eternal' (D&C 42:61).

To miss the joy is to miss the point."

28 August

2011-08-29T02:03:00.001-06:00

I am one proud sister.

Today was my sister's missionary farewell at church. As she enters the MTC soon, she had the opportunity to speak. Her assigned topic was "truth restored". Let me just say, her talk was eloquent, spiritual, and beautiful. I was beaming, thinking about her as a missionary and the lives that she will touch. The congregation was filled with family and friends who were also cheering on my dear sister.

Today, I am grateful for living near family. Growing up in Oregon, we only got to see most of our family members about once a year, and so it was always a very big, special event whenever we were with our family. Since moving to Utah, we get to see our family that lives here much more regularly, but every time we get together, I still feel that same excitement whenever we get together with members of our extended family. Today was especially special, since we were there to celebrate Sarah. I love being with my family and as we are together, I can feel the eternal ties that bind us together.

Life is Beautiful:

Sitting in the chapel with my family, I re-realized during the passing of the Sacrament how powerful the symbolism of the Sacrament is. It is passed to us by those who have the restored priesthood authority, and then after we partake of the Sacrament ourselves, we pass it to those that we sit by. As I passed it along to one of my family members and they continued the Sacrament on to other family members, I thought of how such an action represents what we do in life. As family members and friends, we help one another in living good lives and keeping the commandments. We support one another in our struggles and temptations and concerns. That is beautiful symbolism that helps us further remember Christ's sacrifice and also His charge to love one another and feed His sheep.

27 August

2011-08-28T00:06:00.001-06:00

Anyone need an in-cart babysitter?

Hahaha.

My blessing for today: the unexpected. Whether it be your cousin suddenly picking up your sister and putting her in the cart at Costco {and then asking strangers in the store if they needed an in-cart babysitter} or finding the Oscar Meyer wiener-mobile outside of Walmart...

...{there's a family story or two about why that's so great}, little surprises are just absolutely delightful and I think they're one of the elements that make life so great.

Life is Beautiful:

Here's a fun video that some friends shared with us that showcases the unexpected in an absolutely adorable manner:

26 August

2011-08-27T01:00:00.001-06:00

A few things I'm grateful for:

~ Spanning time with my sister

~ That Courtney currently lives in UT

~ Pink sunsets

[It looks orange. But believe me, it was a beautiful, beautiful pink.]

~ Doing spontaneous things, like jumping into a pool in your clothes {which is even cooler when one of the people supporting such spontaneity is a member of the bishopric}

[you can't really tell, but we are soaking wet and loving it]

~ Seeing the younger sibling of a friend come to start her first year at BYU - it brought back all the memories of how great freshman year was!

Life is Beautiful:

One of my friends shared this spectacular cartoon/story/artwork, and I adore it. It's specifically about being an artist, but it applies also to choosing what you want to do in life and following your passion. The image that I'm posting is found here, and I believe it's by JellyVampire.

{once again, from here).

25 August

2011-08-25T22:51:00.000-06:00

My blessing for today is photography. I love it for its artistic potential, but mainly for the opportunity that we have to freeze a moment to remember forever, like this sweet moment from today:

One of the things about Sarah leaving on her mission that we talk about is how the precious babies in our lives will be toddlers when she returns. It's all the more wonderful, then, to be able to capture moments like this. These two girls are two other HUGE blessings in my life!

Life is Beautiful:

I think most of you know my deep love of Florence + the Machine, and one of my friends who also knows of this deep love {and who probably knows my propensity of sharing music I love on my blog} passed along this fabulous new song to me:

LA Times, I agree: I love Florence + the Machine's use of "soaring gospel-rooted harmonies and tribal chants on top of ethereal harp strings and intense lyrics". So good.

24 August

2011-08-24T22:17:00.002-06:00

I'm blogging while I'm watching "I didn't Know I Was Pregnant," and oh my goodness, these stories are madness! Can you imagine?

Anywho...

My blessing for today is my dear friend Amanda. We grew up together and Amanda is pretty much my sister. She comes down from Portland once or twice a year to visit, and she was down here this last week. It was so grand getting to spend time with her, and I love the person that she is. Amanda is one of the most selfless and talented people I know. I love you, Amanda Panda!

Life is Beautiful:

Today I spent much of the day at Color Me Mine, aka one of the best places ever. Iron & Wine provided my soundtrack as I painted. Here are a few of my many faves:

{haha - what's with the graphic here?}

{I love the original of this song and I love this}

23 August

2011-08-23T22:27:00.001-06:00

Today, we had a wee bit of an adventure here:

The Saratoga Springs/Lehi Hot Springs. It's a natural hot spring that my friends and I used to go to all the time. It's off of a trail in Saratoga Springs right next to Utah Lake. Now, this springs is VERY natural. There's no nice pool, seats, etc. It's just a pond with delightfully warm water and slightly less delightful marshy conditions, silty ground, and sulfuric smell. We always went in the winter and I think this was my first time going in the summer, which we discovered is probably a less desirable time to go. We had quite the experience soaking in the hot springs! My blessing for today - experiences that remind you of old experiences with dear friends and allow you to at the same time create new memories. This was the case today! And in case you're thinking of going, maybe just maybe wait until the fall or winter... :)

Life is Beautiful:

One of my friend's features a quote on her blog from President Hinckley that I love:

"You will have significant experiences. I hope that you will write them down and keep a record of them, that you will read them from time to time and refresh your memory of these meaningful, significant things. Some of them may be funny. Some may be of significance only to you. Some of them may be sacred and quietly beautiful. Some may build one upon another until they represent a lifetime of special experiences." - Gordon B. Hinckley

Sometimes quotes can be attributed to individuals that are not necessarily from them, and my preliminary research shows that this is featured on A LOT of blogs, but I haven't found the original quote source yet. But I'm hoping that it is a real quote from President Hinckley, because it's a sweet quote about keeping your own record and history.

22 August

2011-08-22T23:50:00.000-06:00

Two blessings for today:

- Life advice from one of my favorite personal advisers/friends, who always seems to know how to discuss options in a way that just makes sense to me. {You know who you are - drive safely to CA!} I have a few friends like this, whom I feel I can gain real insight and strength in decision-making from.

- That feeling you get when you push past the point of kind of dreading something to remembering that you actually enjoy the process.

Life is Beautiful:

Amanda just introduced me to the mimic octopus, which is this fantastical creature that can change its appearance quickly to confuse or confront predators. It's pretty darn amazing to watch:

21 August

2011-08-21T23:19:00.000-06:00

My blessing for today: sister heart-to-hearts. My sister has a way of making my thoughts and worries and concerns feel as though they are understandable and shared and lessened.

I love my sister with all of my heart!

Life is Beautiful:

I was looking through my journal and came across my notes from President Samuelson's fireside in the Hyde Park chapel a few months ago. Using Doctrine and Covenants 25 as an example, he discussed how although much of Doctrine and Covenants is composed of revelations to specific individuals, it is also applicable to all of us, just as D&C 25:16 tells us:

"And verily, verily, I say unto you, that this is my voice unto all."

As I was thinking about this, I realized that it is the same with all books of scripture. We are blessed that we can learn from the revelations and stories and experiences of those in the scriptures and use them to learn and grow as individuals. I am grateful for that!

20 August

2011-08-21T01:14:00.000-06:00

We girls had a blast today.

We combined a few of the best things in the world - bookstores, toy shops, Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory apples, Color Me Mine, Mexican food, bowling, and dancing - into one jam-packed afternoon/evening. My blessing for today is when you have enjoyable days that are filled with several of your favorite things. Here's a bit of what we did:

{A note about bowling: It was my first time bowling since my arm injury. Little known fact about me, but I was actually on my school's bowling team in high school and we got fifth place in State! I was an alternate, but I made it on the official team and loved it. I've missed bowling and it was so much fun to play together tonight, even though my robot arm is now reminding me of its existence.}

Life is Beautiful:

I think I've mentioned once or twice that my favorite poet is e.e. cummings. I love the structure of his words and how it makes the phrases and ideas move and flow together is a beautiful, almost musical rhythm. Here's "dive for dreams":

dive for dreams
or a slogan may topple you
(trees are their roots
and wind is wind)
trust your heart
if the seas catch fire
(and live by love
though the stars walk backward)
honour the past
but welcome the future
(and dance your death
away at the wedding)
never mind a world
with its villains or heroes
(for good likes girls
and tomorrow and the earth)
in spite of everything
which breathes and moves, since Doom
(with white longest hands
neating each crease)
will smooth entirely our minds
-before leaving my room
i turn, and (stooping
through the morning) kiss
this pillow, dear
where our heads lived and were.

silently if, out of not knowable

silently if, out of not knowable
night's utmost nothing,wanders a little guess
(only which is this world)more my life does
not leap than with the mystery your smile
sings or if(spiralling as luminous
they climb oblivion)voices who are dreams,
less into heaven certainly earth swims
than each my deeper death becomes your kiss
losing through you what seemed myself,i find
selves unimaginably mine;beyond
sorrow's own joys and hoping's very fears
yours is the light by which my spirit's born:
yours is the darkness of my soul's return
-you are my sun,my moon,and all my stars

19 August

2011-08-20T00:49:00.001-06:00

My blessing today is the eternal family. Many aspects of my day allowed me to reflect that families can be together forever. I started thinking about this tonight, when my sweet little baby cousin started crying. We tried all the tricks and she still was upset, until we all started singing primary songs. It wasn't simply the act of singing that calmed her down; instead, it was the fact that her five-year-old sister was singing for her. She just stared at her older sister and calmed down, and as we sang several songs about eternal families she kept her gaze on her big sister. I know that those two sisters are tied together with a strong familial tie that exists through God's plan and is found in the temple.

Tonight, I also got to attend the wedding reception for one of my dear friends from the London program. Tomorrow, she and her fiance will start on their own eternal journey. I love her and I'm so excited for her!

Another aspect of eternity that I love to ponder on is our relationships with our friends, which can also be eternal. I treasure sharing significant and meaningful experiences with my friends. Today I got to share such with one of the most impressive people I know:

I also get to spend the next few days with another dear friend.

You know what? Life can be hard, but is also beautiful. And I love to think about the beauty that exists in the eternities.

Life is Beautiful:

“May our families and homes be filled with love: love of each other, love of the gospel, love of our fellowman, and love of our Savior.”
~ President Thomas S. Monson

18 August

2011-08-18T23:59:00.001-06:00

I am very, very excited for this:

http://arts.byu.edu/calendar/eventdescription_v2.php?eventid=18

My blessing for today is Les Miserables. I adore that musical. Today we watched part of the 25th anniversary production {with the best Javert ever}, and so when I looked on BYU news and found out that Lea Salonga, who played both Eponine and Fantine in productions of Les Mis over the years, is performing at BYU in the beginning of September, I may have grabbed a ticket asap. It's going to be amazing!

Life is Beautiful:

We went to Education Week again today, and we attended a class by S. Michael Wilcox on lessons learned from Solomon's writings in Ecclesiastes. He read through much of Ecclesiastes and discussed what we can learn from Solomon's discussions of life, priorities, and growing older. Solomon's writing is beautifully eloquent. Here are a few of my favorite verses:

" He hath made every thing beautiful in his time: also he hath set the world in their heart, so that no man can find out the work that God maketh from the beginning to the end.

I know that there is no good in them, but for a man to rejoice, and to do good in his life.

And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it is the gift of God." ~ Ecclesiastes 3:11-13

"Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.

For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.

Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?

And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken." ~ Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

"In the day of prosperity be joyful, but in the day of adversity consider: God also hath set the one over against the other, to the end that man should find nothing after him." ~ Ecclesiastes 7:14

"Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man." ~ Ecclesiastes 12:13

17 August

2011-08-18T00:50:00.000-06:00

I love learning. On Monday, Sarah and I were around a bit of the BYU Education Week scene, and I realized that I've never been to Education Week. I decided to head over there today and experience it. I really enjoyed the spirit of a love of learning that permeates BYU campus during Education Week.

Oh, and my friend Alex is another blessing.

And I think the outside of the Provo temple looks like the Garden of Eden.

Life is Beautiful:
A little more about peace, from a spiritual perspective and a servant of the Lord:

"The promise to enter into the rest of the Lord, to receive the gift of peace, is far from a temporary, worldly satisfaction. It is indeed a heavenly gift: 'Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid' (John 14:27). He has the power to heal and strengthen the soul." ~ Elder Per G. Malm, Quorum of the Seventy

16 August

2011-08-16T19:53:00.003-06:00

I love peace. It's something that I think we can work more towards in life - in our personal relationships, our communities, our political interactions, and our international relations. I know that elements of peace can be achieved through selflessness and love. Hoping for peace is a blessing. Sarah and I came across this beautiful sculpture depicting peace today:

We liked it so much that we joined right in reaching for peace:

Sarah and I walked by the Provo Tabernacle today. The first time I saw the Provo Tabernacle after the ravaging fire was difficult, because of the history that our own family has with the Tabernacle and my own love for that building. I was a bit anxious when we went to see it today until we went by and saw this:

It's looking a lot better! I hope that it'll be completely renovated, because it's such a great building. I heart it.

Life is Beautiful:
"We all lived with God as spirits before we were born."

14-15 August

2011-08-16T00:21:00.002-06:00

Life is just so good.

Today was a great day and yesterday was a great day. Let me tell you two things that made these days great:

1. The piano.

I have always adored playing the piano. One of my favorite things in life is to sit in front of the piano and just play, usually from my musical theatre songbooks. I could do that for hours. This last year I did not have regular access to a piano, and so I've been eating up being back at home with our piano. If only I could find my Les Miserables music.

2. Starting the day at the temple.

Sarah and I went to our first session at the Provo Temple this morning. Most temples are closed on Monday because of the emphasis on spending Mondays with our families for Family Home Evening, but the Provo Temple is open in the morning, and Sarah and I thought it would be a great beginning to the week. It was a sweet experience and I am so grateful for the peace and beauty of the temple and temple work. I know that it is important and of God.

Since the Provo Temple is right night to the Missionary Training Center, there are many missionaries at the temple at any given time, and since Sarah and I are both young single adult women, everyone thought that we were sister missionaries! We had to explain, as Sarah later put it, that we were not "Sisters" but were sisters, and also that soon Sarah would be a missionary. :) We decided that we would be the best missionary companions ever.

Other fab things:
~ Catching up with my aunt and uncle!
~ Seeing friends at church for the first time back!
~ Time with the cutest, most talented, two-year-old around!
~ Reminiscing around the BYU Bookstore and the Wilk!
~ Running into a former Cambridge missionary at the Wilk!
~ Cupcakes with our cousin/sister!
~ Getting our organizing on!

Life is Beautiful:
Right now I'm loving this:

and this:

oh, and this quote:

"She made you decent and in return you made her so happy." ~ One Day trailer

13 August

2011-08-13T23:41:00.000-06:00

I can't believe that it's already August. This year is just flying by!

Last night, we went as a family and performed at our grandma's assisted living home. It was a Smith Family Music Night, and it was so much fun. We performed for about 20 residents, singing some of our family favorites. As we sang, I loved looking out at the residents - they were smiling, dancing along, and one woman kept giving us thumbs up throughout the whole performance. Most of all, it was great to look out at my dear grandma, who was so happy and proud.

{Here she is during my mom's solo:}

Being there reminded me of what a blessing it is to interact with those who are older and have lived amazing lives. My grandma is a constant reminder of this - she is 92 years young and she has accomplished so much in her life!

Today, we drove up the canyon and played a game up by the river. Another blessing is the beauty of canyons, and a third is living close to many beautiful canyons.

Life is Beautiful:

It's pretty darn majestic up in the canyon:

6-12 August

2011-08-12T16:27:00.001-06:00

Does anyone else feel like I haven't posted in forever? Because I sure do! A lot has happened in the last week - farewells with dear friends, sneaking in some of my favorite British things for the last time {for a while}, long travels, cherishing being home, Mexican meals, and the return of my best buddy jet lag. I believe I'm seven blessings behind, and as I've had that many and more in the past week, let me highlight a few:

~ Knowing that life has a way of bringing you back to people and places you love.

I said goodbye to some beloved people this week - friends from church and friends from university. I love that even though it's hard to part, my past experience in life is that it's not a forever parting. Life has a way of bringing people back together again - this has happened to me already this summer with a friend I thought I wouldn't be able to see for a long time - and so I know that I'll see them around. But meanwhile, I love them and miss them! Here are some of my dear friends from church:

~ Acknowledgment for academic successes. I may or may not thrive on academic approval, and seeing this on the bulletin board outside the John's dining hall made me oh so happy:

~ TV screens on long-haul flights. I've been on flights with it and I've been on flights without it and believe me, those screens make a difference when you're flying 10 hours.

~ Sweet little coincedences. I had been traveling for about 17 hours when I found out that our flight at Dallas had been delayed at least 2 hours to let two other flights depart before us {thoughtful, right?} As I was walking to find a seat by the gate, I looked over and happened to see one of my sister's friends from her childhood that she's still close with. He, along with a senior missionary couple, a sister missionary returning from home, and two elders leaving for their mission were all on the same flight as me! Getting to catch up with him, as well as talk with the missionaries, made the delay much better!

~ First class. Let's face it, I'm a fan of first class, even though I've only flown on it twice in my life. A life goal of mine is to fly first class on a trans-Atlantic flight. Well, I was offered a first class upgrade not on my trip from London but on my Dallas-SLC trip, and because it was inexpensive I decided to treat myself, since I knew that I would be VERY tired by that point of the trip and would want to sleep {and first class chairs are much more conducive than those in coach for such}. Well, first class is even better when you've already had a two-hour delay and then when you're about to take off have to return to the gate to have a mechanic check a door and then have to refuel and then wait in a long line to take off again. I slept about an hour of that time in my comfortable first class seat. Mmmm.

~ Being close to family. That's probably what I like the most about living in Utah!

~ The early mornings that jet lag provides. My jet lag is in full force right now, and the latest I have been able to sleep in is 6:30. I've never been much of a morning person, but it actually feels pretty great to be wide awake at 5 or 6 in the morning. And it's conducive to early morning Scrabble games, which is always fun.

Life is Beautiful:

I'm a big fan of Apple's new cloud function. Through it, I've been able to re-download some songs that I purchased before but no longer had the files for. I was perhaps most excited to re-download this haunting song, one of my favorites: